imitating the Rabbi

Lest I forget

2011-12-23T20:25:00.002-07:00

[from an un-mailed letter to my dearest non-biological sister, several years ago ... I wonder what would have happened had it ended up with its rightful "owner"] ..

...My life nowadays is comprised of work, reading, sleeping, and occasionally finding some kind of food. my life nowadays is not comprised of exercise or daily Bible reading or hanging out with people. I have "time," it seems, to read book after book from the library, but when it comes to reading love letters from (and about) the Creator of the universe, i throw it aside and go to sleep. . My heart is growing cold and crusty, and I don't know whether to like it or hate it. I know I ought to hate it because it says so in the Bible and all, but I'm not sure if I like it, either,. If I don't really "like it," though, the fact is still there that I am tolerating a cold heart. Or lukewarm. Or hypocritical. Or all of the above. Either way, I do not like the position I find myself in now. The thing is, I don't know where to start to change it, or to ask God to change it. My heart should be crying right now, but there are some kind of callouses growing over any tear ducts and the tears cannot escape, no matter how much I wish.

All this I haven't really thought about writing until now, so I suppose this letter is something of a thinking process... If you can bear reading it, maybe it will give you something to pray about. Because seriously, I don't know if I can really pray anymore. I still "talk" to God, but I don't really "listen" to Him anymore, so it's not really "talking," but more like a 3-year-old. And I don't even know if it hurts. It's like when someone's so used to pulling hot cookie sheets from the over with their hands that it doesn't hurt and they can't feel it when they go without oven mitts to take the pans from a hot oven.

blessing #10 - failure

2011-11-28T14:43:00.001-07:00

My class is ridiculously unable to sit without talking when it's just myself in the room, but when the principal is in the room, they are as silent as a newborn rock.

*sigh* ...

~this was taken during our archaeological dig expedition in the class ... aren't they just adorable? :p

Lately my quizzes and tests (well, the ones my students take) are incredibly either high or low, rarely in-between as far as grades go. :/ ugh. I can't do much when half of the class fails and the other half - that studied! - passes with flying colors (whatever THAT idiom means ) ... suggestions? they need to know the material, but a good portion of the class is having trouble listening in class, and i'm sure i'm just a terrible teacher. ugh .... but the failures are a good thing, because maybe this is the wake-up call some parents need to start paying attention to their babies ...

Blessing #9 - routine

2011-11-26T14:03:00.001-07:00

It is in the routine of life where we are really visible.

Establishing this routine - school, kids, dating, more kids, church, more kids, making new friends, more kids, maintaining relationships, more kids - has been changing who I am.

Each day, I have the choice - Joshua 24:15. I can choose to serve gods, or I can chose to serve God. Some days, I make little choices that serve gods like my students, my boyfriend, my family, or myself. Other days, I can jump up and down and spin in circles because I can honestly say I was serving Him - those are the best days. ... but they're still not as regular as I would like. I want to be at my 111% for Him. Not just 87%, or 94%, or even 17%. . . but 111%. (That's my number - substitutable for whole-hearted.)

and part of being 111% is what I do in the routine, everyday bits that appear day after day after day.

the chaos of being a "first" (albeit, second) year teacher is wearing down and picking up at the same time. We've survived the first quarter, I've noticed both good and bad things that need tweaking in my classroom, and God's been reteaching me the importance of carving (and stealing, if need be) time for Him alone.

I've been trying to read a bit of Proverbs every day, along with a bit of various books and passages. I want to go deeper. starting with every little bit of every day God gives me - the big days and the small ones.

blessing #8 - a new body

2011-08-14T20:19:00.000-07:00

went to church at South Dade today - it was good :) they used to be about the size of West Cannon but after hurrican Andrew hit lost a lot of people (because of the damage to the area, etc). but anyways.... definitely super solid, super loving group. I got to hang out with some kids while their parents were at choir practice :)
also, studied some of how Philippians 1:9-11 (Paul's prayer for abounding love) relates to I Corinthians 13 and I John 4:7+ ... pretty neat.
And David's here now - we just ran to Walmart to pick up some groceries. He's staying with the pastor for now, and they invited us over for dinner with their kids / grandkids :) good fellowship, sweet people. Pull-apart biscuits and stew :)

God is good.

blessing #7 - 3 days down.

2011-08-13T04:43:00.001-07:00

This week I had "new teacher orientation." Lots of [free] breakfast, sunrises and sunsets, gorgeous clouds and spontaneous rainstorms (in Miami (that's what they all call the general area, even if Miami is 45ish minutes away) there are lots of random rainstorms. Perhaps it's like another peninsula I know, where the weather "changes" every five minutes . . . usually the rain doesn't last long, but sometimes it's sideways rain. Those are the days where umbrellas are purely decorative. :) "My" camper door exits to the North, so I can peek out and see beautiful clouds or sunrises or sunsets any time of day, basically. Like a few minutes ago, I peeked myself over to the door and there was a lizard just chilling between the screen and the door. This post is totally stream of consciousness, Amanda-style (which means I throw in some complementary punctuation in or out of its proper place). He didn't want his picture taken, so he let me take a picture of the screen with his little body slightly blurred in the background. Anyways.

We went over policies, procedures, curriculum stuffs, et cetera, with The Administrator. It was great fun. We got to jump into our classrooms, and apparently this school is super flexible with their teachers as far as decorations. After spending countless hours in rooms where flexibility is basically frowned upon, it was super refreshing to see teachers painting their rooms purple, green, blue, et cetera. . . and rooms full of raccoons :) yeah, Ms. Johnson! (the 1st grade version). I got to meet with last year's fifth grade teacher; prettier than Idina Menzel, and has a cute li'l bump :) she gave me a good run-through of all the fun of fifth grade.... like safeties, the fifth grade end-of-the-year trip (like "sixth grade camp" at Crestview - fifth graders are the bigshots at my school here. :) her time schedule (YAYYY) and lots of other fun things. :) Also got to go to "Get Smart" with Habyibah (4th grade!) and her mum (the amazing teacher superstore = store FOR teachers, not selling teachers) and only spent less than half of the amount "gifted" to each teacher at ma school. Got some neat stuff - my classroom "theme" is going to be rather international - thinking Acts 1:8 or something similar, or praying for the brothers in chains, or ...)taking suggestions(
Also stopped at "Whole Foods" and found an amazing hummus - it had lemons in it. OH MYLANTA. : )

Now doing some research on family "devotions". . . thoughts? opinions? suggestions? - i.e. regularly scheduled, spontaneous, how often, is it / are they important? Something I need to research, that's all woot woot.

^^^
~~~~~~Scripture to back it up, comments preferred on the blog, please. (not on FB).

anyways, it is a blessing to have the first 3 days of orientation "done."

blessing #6 - climate change

2011-07-27T21:57:00.000-07:00

methinks I need to update more often, because then i might have more quality posts / at least post more than once a month.
i am moving to a wee bit south of miami, and looking forward to a change of pace . . . Going to be teaching at a Christian school down there - 5th grade! Open to all of your advices!

side note - g'bye party at Crystie Long's this Sunday evening after church. come from wherever you are. and if you can't come ..
GET SKYPE. so we can talk once i'm in FLORIDA. craziness.

God is good.

I finished my huge portfolio, so other than discussion questions, I am DONE with classes. (other than student teaching, too, i guess).

it CRAZY-STORMED here tonight. as in, the rain was so loud I could barely hear the (slightly-old) news about the heartbreaks in Norway. it's amazing how big God is. He can create just by speaking. He can stop things just by speaking ... yet He humbled Himself to take my place, my punishment!

What a wonderful saviour!

(repost from May 4th, 2008) - blessing #5 - babies

2011-07-26T16:40:00.000-07:00

This past weekend I got to meet two new babies - my friend Tracie's baby Lucas (a month old), and the newest addition to Berean Baptist, John Gage - called "Gage" as, i guess, most of his dad's line of men are named John ____ and go by their middle name. Rather cool concept, if you ask me.

   At -(one of my roomates)- Danielle's baby shower, Lucas was a darling most of the time I held him. We had fun... I put him on his stomach across my lap and he just chilled until his socks fell off.   It was great to see Danielle and Leonard again, and watch how excited they were to get ready for their baby and how loving they were towards each other. It was also great to see Tracie and Lucas and how becoming a mommy has changed my friend for the better - someone as small as Lucas was, making such a difference in so many lives.

And at church today I met Gage - the oldest looking newborn I've ever met. He had the aged, wise old man look to his face, which was intriguing to see on one so young. Not your ordinary chubby-cheeked baby-faced baby, but a young man in a baby's body. Incredibly handsome, to say the least, and incredibly tiny. And fashionable, in his little white knit cap.

Both of these little men were fortunate enough to be born into families where God is honored and people have made the choice to serve the Master rather than the World... how many others have been born this year alone into families that are struggling to make ends meet or struggling with sin and its effects? Pray for the babies you never meet - and the ones you do. I've seen God work in so many lives, and I know for a fact not all of these lives started in homes where God reigned.
I've also seen children that have been blessed with parents who "chose" (if you will) to follow Christ, only to run away from their Creator as soon as they leave home.

I wish it weren't that way. I need far more than both of my hands to keep a count of the people I know who've been entrusted with godly, loving parents only to turn their back on everything true and real.

Choices, decisions, and heartbreak.

"Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it. - Pr. 22:6

"If serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselvesthis day whom you will serve, whether the gods your forefathers servedbeyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. - Joshua 24:15

Something somewhere - most likely the nasty thing we know as sin - gets in the way of the "way he should go" and forces the people who were once babies to make a choice... a choice much like the ones made by the Israelites in Joshua's time. God's side - the God who basically conquered the inhabitants of the land for the Israelites, or the world's side?

a choice that - when made - can set fire to the innocence of the babies we adore.

One day, Lucas and Gage will have to choose. As must you and I. Joshua commands his people to make their choices ASAP. There is an urgency there, because innocence once lost is never again found in its entirety.

Pray for these two new little men, and for the babies you meet or are planning on meeting - pray that God will allow them to make a choice for Him, and that their parents will lead them into the battle for truth.

Pray for your own choices; pray that the choice you make every day will be to serve the God of Israel. All other gods will fall before the true God, as will all who chose false gods...

pray for innocence to return to our land. Make choices that bring innocence back... see what He can do when you do.

I hope this post was encouraging... and understandable. It's just something I've had on my mind and I needed to share it.

from my olde Xanga

blessing # 4 - back off, enemies! I cling to Christ!

2011-06-23T08:46:00.000-07:00

Even though our armor may have chinks in it, He still holds everything together (yay, Colossians) and is orchestrating things for His glory! I was able to take a biblical counseling class last fall that was led by Terry Burlingame, and ever since then my inbox has been attacked by truthbits. (well, Monday through Friday). Sometimes I don't read them because I don't feel like getting poked in the eye, but God has used these little message/reminders many, many times to bring my heart closer to His. and that is a blessing (yes, I just started a sentence with "and" ...)

So here is the blessing from this morning. God is good, and He IS good. no matter what we are going through emotionally, physically, spiritually. I cling to Christ,

His robes for mine: O wonderful exchange!
Clothed in my sin, Christ suffered ‘neath God’s rage.
Draped in His righteousness, I’m justified.
In Christ I live, for in my place He died.

I cling to Christ, and marvel at the cost:Jesus forsaken, God estranged from God.Bought by such love, my life is not my own.My praise-my all-shall be for Christ alone.

His robes for mine: what cause have I for dread?
God’s daunting Law Christ mastered in my stead.
Faultless I stand with righteous works not mine,
Saved by my Lord’s vicarious death and life.

His robes for mine: God’s justice is appeased.
Jesus is crushed, and thus the Father’s pleased.
Christ drank God’s wrath on sin, then cried “‘Tis done!”
Sin’s wage is paid; propitiation won.

His robes for mine: such anguish none can know.
Christ, God’s beloved, condemned as though His foe.
He, as though I, accursed and left alone;
I, as though He, embraced and welcomed home!
(-Chris Anderson)

and now, the "morning desk" -

Romans 8.18-39

At times we may feel like all is against us, that nothing is going the way we had planned, and that the road ahead has far too many obstacles for us to travel. It can seem that we are being ambushed by the enemy from every angle and that we have no way of overcoming our current struggle. But, as believers we must not live on what we “feel” or what “seems.” Rather, we must firmly hold to what is true. “If God is for us, who can be against us. He who did not spare His own Son but gave Him up for us all, how will He not also with Him graciously give us all things” (Romans 8.31-32). No obstacle is too great for God, no circumstance too difficult, no enemy too strong. None can stand against Him, and being in Christ none can successfully stand against us. We must remember that the enemy is not defeated by our feelings; he is not silenced by what “seems” right. Rather, he is stopped by the power of the Almighty Lord, he is halted by the Truth of God’s Word, he is silenced by the King of kings and the Lord of lords. Remembering what our Lord has done motivates us to trust and move forward. He “gave up” His own Son for us – who lived among sinful men, shed His blood on the Cross for us, and was placed in the tomb for us, for our redemption, for our salvation, for our deliverance, for our freedom, for our hope, for our eternity. He gave His all that we might know Him, escape rightful condemnation, and be freed from eternal separation. Knowing this to be true, we can have absolute confidence that now He will not leave us alone, leave us stranded, or forget about us, but will with Christ “graciously give us all things.” Whatever our troubles, struggles, difficulties, or need, our merciful Lord will lovingly provide everything we need to victoriously walk in this day. Our confidence in Him can be unwavering, for He has purchased us and designed to keep us; in Him alone we have hope, victory, and rest.

Terry Burlingame

*let me know if you'd like to get his weekday thoughts sent to your email - he'd love to add you to his list :)

a little story

2011-06-15T14:45:00.000-07:00

transcribed from an assortment of text messages between Crystie and myself one fine day while she was at work and I was traveling to / at / from a track meet. Crystie's contributions are in bold, and mine are in plain type.

A little boy was walking along the beach and found a
hairtie!
and he thought what am i going to do with a hairtie hmmm ...
shoot it at a gull!
But then a huge wave knocked him down
(the gull or the boy?)
the boy... but u write it how u want ;)
He magically turned into a flounder and squiggled all the way to the bottom of the sea . . .
where he saw a beautiful underwater castle filled with
naked mermaids (of course, we all know mermaids don't wear shells. that's purely uncomfortable) ...
He smiled and thought oh yeah this is the life he then saw an octopus off in the distance and started swimming towards it
the octopus was allergic to little boys so he pulled out his
8 limbs to cover his mouth when he sneezed which caused a massive wave knocking the fish back into a boy
the size of a small chihuahua
he put his little hands in front and started "doggy" paddling to shore
and ran into a
sand castle
shaped liike the White House. A figurine of Barakster was standing on the stoop connected to the servants' entrance near the back, one hand raised in salute. "Egad!" exclaimed the youngster as he
did some remodeling adding a mcdonalds and an indoor pool near the courtyard
and topped it all off with a terrarium full of
his friends all holding snakes
and each snake held a lovely parrot in its mouth
he began screaming only to wake up to his mom holding him saying dont worry it was all just a dream honey
as she bit his neck
no he did not the story is over
[^killjoy]

June Bugs and a fat sparrow (blessing #3)

2011-06-06T18:24:00.000-07:00

"Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his life?" (Matthew 6:26-27, Jesus speaking).

So I considered a lone sparrow, happily feasting on hundreds of dead June bugs outside of a quiet video store one day this past week. The tiny speckled bird had no concerns darkening his feathers, but was darting about feasting on the fallen bugs (which most likely died after encountering the store's sign or some such chaos).
There were no other birds about when I noticed him (or was it a she?), but the voracity with which the little bird gobbled up insects showed me how much trust - if you can call what animals have trust - was placed in its provider.

May my trust be the same in the Creator, whether surrounded by plenty or living with one mere june bug.

blessing #1 and #2 - wild in the city / alive in the city

2011-05-26T13:16:00.000-07:00

I might as well share the little bits of amazingness that God daily touched my inmost me with on a basically daily basis...

because i've been trying to apply thankfulness lately. so yay!

I had two-and-a-half rather rough classes of 7th/8th graders yesterday, but God used those three classes as a backdrop to a wonderful-good blessing to finish out the work day.

While the last class of kids was coming in, I was walking around tidying chairs and papers. The kids started gathering by the window in the corner of the room, and a few of them started yelling, "Bambi!! It's Bambi!!" I looked toward the window, but didnt' see anything. The kids kept shouting, so I put the papers down on the teacher's desk and walked toward the window. There, on the slightly suburban lawn of the slightly suburban school's slightly suburban playground, was a whitetail doe and an incredibly young whitetail fawn, all speckly in the just-washed grass. The fawn started suckling, the kids got freaked out until I told them it was just drinking, and the oohs ensued until both deer noticed the ruckus going on in the window and pranced off. The students gradually disbanded, I took attendance, and math papers started getting covered in lead and ink.

Today I was driving home from spending a few hours with second graders. We'd started out by watching some of Madeleine on a VHS, then worked on assorted assignments. After sending everyone home (at the appropriate time, of course!), I got into the car and drove down Division (aka Plainfield). Blessing #2 happened on a side street - I witnessed a walker-bound man attempting to help another men up from the pavement where he'd fallen. It's things like this that really ought to make the news, not death and destruction. So there it is - whoever you are, thank you for humbling yourself and helping up a man in need, even though you, yourself, are so obviously in need. Even if this man is not a God-follower, God used him to show me that His love can be displayed ...somehow =) woo hoo!

Dateup.

2011-05-22T14:01:00.000-07:00

Erm, yes, it has been a length of time or time since last I posted, but I are still alive. God is good :)

Project: cutting up old tshirts, crocheting the strips into an oval-ular rug. It's maybe 3' x 1' right now, but I'm not really good with numbers, so we shall see what it really is never. : )

Finished a series Lauraine Snelling wrote set in MEDORA - Rather good, but I want to go visit TRNP now like whoa.

Flew a kite with David.

planted some peas from Goodwill and they have sprouted.

learned a lot with other females at / through "Far Above Rubies" with West Cannon chicas. Totallilly up my alley=) facts / hints, etc. coming soon perhaps. we have a huge binder-full.

Deuteronomy has a lot in common with Romans :)

i propagated some rhubarb and now have 5 plants that made it! :)

Isaiah and short-term ministry

2011-03-18T06:11:00.002-07:00

So much has happened lately - it always does (or so it seems) when one is learning more and more daily to trust the Abba.

I have about 115 hexagons sewn together, and about 25 "flowers" (hexagons sewn into groups of 7) finished and waiting for a bit until I can attach them to the quilt top. I am shooting for 2,000-3,000 hexagons total, and I want to have a scalloped edge (made from the hexagons). It might take forever, but I've had a few easier sub jobs of late that make the sewing-of-flowers part happen.

:)

nb: I've been reading through Isaiah with David on the nights that school hasn't whelmed us, and it's been good to have someone to bounce a Major Prophet around :)   Isaiah's been one of the books I've wanted to read, but always seemed to muddle up in my head, so *the very day he asked me out!* my darling boyfriend gave me a book on Isaiah (Weirsbe's Be Comforted) to read with him. It's been so good! Reading about Emmanuel in chapter 7 was good, and not just because there is a real hope for Israel, but also because God is with me today because of Christ's work! It is such a blessing to have a man in my life who treasures my heart and is loving me the way Christ loves the Body!!

Yesterday I was subbing at Lowell MS and one of the dear 6th graders (from the middle of the room) said, "Miss Johnson, you look young. Can I guess how old you are? ...*(paused)* I'm going to guess you're 22."
    oh, children.

David has helped me to see that substitute teaching is an acceptable ministry opportunity - even though I've pondered this before, it helps to have another human tell me it's okay that I may only ever see some of these kids once in their lifetimes. God can still use those one-or-so-hours to bring Him glory by how I interact with these children.

Talking with Kim Walburg has also helped me to see something else:
    The kids that maybe are the naughtiest in the classroom (the ones that I end up scolding quite a bit during the day) are usually the ones that, at the end of the day, come up to me with a huge hug and tell me I'm the best teacher ever. .... and this may simply be because I am trying to enforce proper discipline procedures when their own classroom teacher may have given up because of the naughtiness.

Herein is my hope -
Wash yourselves; make yourselves clean; remove the evil of your deeds from before my eyes; cease to do evil, learn to do good; seek justice, correct oppression; bring justice to the fatherless, plead the widow's cause.

Come, let us walk in the light of the Lord.

...the Lord along will be exalted in that day.

THE LORD OF HOSTS IS EXALTED IN JUSTICE, AND THE HOLY GOD SHOWS HIMSELF HOLY IN RIGHTEOUSNESS.

note from a first grader

2011-01-21T19:54:00.000-07:00

By mss. Johnson

I love that suBsutut Be coues she is niys and Denzel said a cus wrld and i got on pink an thay got low and we all most didtin go to recss Be coues thim oley me and Juleyn Be coues we wint to the Bathroom I was grat and I was Good and I was Good and Jakiya said the bitth wurd.
The End.

[on the other side of the paper]: love mrs. HOEKSTRA

my translation: [mind you, this is written by a first grader in a class of 22 where almost all of them are very, very little self-control, even for first graders...]

I love that substitute because she is nice and Denzel said a cuss word and I got on pink *[the teacher has a behavior system of colors, and pink is the highest] and they got on low *[this being, many of her classmates were quite naughty] and we almost didn't go to recess because of them*[maybe she thought this because I threatened they would be missing recess and working on sitting quietly - per their teacher's request!] only me and Julian because we went to the bathroom *[insert amazing self-esteem, or spelling practice?] I was great and I was good and I was good and *I'm not sure where this girl heard all the swears, but apparently I missed something in all the chaos they'd presented] Jakiya said the bitth [probably naughty] word.
The End.

it was either written for me or the teacher, but it was on top of my stuff, so...
:)

padiddles

2011-01-07T08:02:00.000-07:00

of all the small things in life, i believe the ones we chose to enjoy are the ones that can pass the time, unite souls, and spark us to better things.

David and I started a contest to see who could get the most padiddles (those unfortunate cars that for whatever reason have one of their lights out), and I have discovered that Grand Rapids is far more Dutch - translate, cheap - than Midland. I also discovered that it helps to pass the time between our visits, and gives us something to do with each other when we are a hundred miles apart.

Here is a sample (yes, I've been keeping track of a good number of the padiddles, and most of them were seen around Grand Rapids, unless otherwise noted):

12/31/10 - 7 padiddles (on the road from GRap to Midland)
1/1/11 - 8 padiddles (on the road from Midland to GRap)
1/2/11 - 8 padiddles
1/3/11 - 1 padiddle *that i recorded*
1/5/11 - 8 padiddles
1/6/11 - 11 padiddles

...and I've already found a few for today.

average west michigan padiddle count (plainfield and northland/East Beltline make up a LOT of this) = over 7 padiddles a day. *phew*

student quotes

2010-12-17T06:02:00.001-07:00

I've been subbing at the same middle school relatively often these days. . . During my first day with one of these classes, after I'd been talking for a bit, one of the girls asked me if I was a flight attendant...
because

"you sound like a flight attendant," she answered to my "why?"

:D I had to crush her hopes. sad day.

oda a la paloma (see Solomon's letters - ch. 2)

2010-12-04T12:18:00.004-07:00

***************************************************por Amanda E. Johnson 12/4/2010

i am a dove:
fragile, pure, silent.

no one can see me where i hide
(hiding in the cracks, on the unseen ledges-
ledges so high off the ground
no evil can find me)
and i feel safe.

everything outside my little home
(on the other side of my cliff)
is frightening,
frightens me
and keeps me inside
safe, and warm.

i venture out for food
(very briefly, but oh, so hungry am i)
and a bit of fresh air.
satiated,
i arrive back in my crevice,
safe.
nothing can harm me if i do not move
and nothing can make me move
from the safest place in the world.

***
something startles me
(it is not quiet any more)
and i begin to shiver
quietly, though
i shiver quietly and listen
with trepidation
for whatever has broken my solitude.

a knocking
and a voice
gently, gently rapping
on the outside of my haven.

i take a curious step
(toward the entrance of my dwelling)
and am startled when a flash
(of rainbow color)
strikes my eye
and i look downward to see its origin-
caught by the sun, a bright diamond
with so many facets
has attached itself to my breast.

the knocking continues.
as i take another step closer
(closer to the outside world)
several more flashing jewels
appear on my soft feathers,
encrusting them with beauty.

by the time I reach the ledge
i am covered
(not a single feather is left on its own)
in jewels so bright that rainbows dance
with every step i take.

i can finally hear the words
(an not just knocking)
as they are being spoken -
a man is speaking,
with gentle tones and a soft voice.

"come out,"
says he.
"it's beautiful out here.
there is no more winter,
no more rain,
no harsh winds to buffet you.
(it is spring,
after all - everything is so very new!)
Come out,
my darling,
my love.

let me see your face,
for it has been hidden so long.

let me hear your voice:
i am sure it is the one i have always heard in my dreams.

come out, my love.

let me see you,
let me hear you,
and come with me.

come out."

with each loving word spoken
i barely notice what happens next:

a hand comes closer
(and closer)
and pauses at the very edge of the cliff.

when he stops talking
i look up,
up,
(up into his face)
and see the truth of his words
is true.

one more step -
no, two -
and i am in his palm,
sparkling, quivering and timid.

"behold, you are beautiful,
so beautiful,
my love!"
(his voice echoes
through my hollow bones
and the shaking stops.)

i realize he has spoken the truth,
and spoken my beauty into existence.

calmly,
quietly,
i rest in his hand,
listening for his voice,
awakened by beauty-
of the spring,
of new life,
of a love so true,
and of my own newly discovered beauty,
for the first time in my life
i begin to sing.

Zeal for Your House will consume Me. . .

2010-11-22T04:53:00.000-07:00

As a follower of the Messiah, does zeal for God's house consume you? (Ps. 69:9, Jn 2:18) (When I write you / we / us / or I, I mean all of those jointly...)

I was reading this morning from John, and remembered the Psalm that ended up describing Jesus in that way from my study last week, and decided to share some thoughts.

As Americans in a freedom-of-religion era (whatever that may mean), we have a responsibility to uphold the truth as highly and as steadily as we can. if that means taking extra time to take care of the church, what are we to do? As a follower - imitator - of the Messiah, the Rabbi, the Holy One of Israel, how are we to view God's house?

I know we don't actually have The Temple in Grand Rapids / Chicago / Dallas / well, anywhere Rob used slash in a meeting last night and credited it to me, but really, I blame Emily R. Smith... but even though we don't have a physical Temple, what are we to view as God's house besides the place we go to partake in corporate worship?

I know, I know - we have a few churches in each neighborhood. Rather, far more than that.

How often, though, do we really care about the building? Jesus was zealous for His Father's House - so much so that he caused a ruckus, a hullabaloo, an ordeal. He didn't like the changes that were happening, and took action. Some people might not have agreed with Him - or profited from His actions - but He took action.

So when a church that you've chosen as "My Father's House" - even though you may not speak or read Hebrew or give sacrifices - has meetings, and people do not show up, should we also take action?

How do we act about keeping the church clean?

How can we help support His House financially, or supervisionally? (I know, not a word, but it is, now...)

Just some thoughts to get you started.

REFERENCES: JOHN 2, PSALM 69

3.15.2007

2010-11-01T05:42:00.000-07:00

Going through old writingness while trying to find a novel I'd started a few years ago, and thought I'd share this :)

enjoy!

March 15, 2007

I am a people-watcher and a keeper of secrets. I spent many wonderful moments with my mother during my childhood doing just that – people-watching.

The people you observe come in all shapes and sizes and colors; no one is left out, and every single person has a story all their own. I’ve often wondered what might happen if I were to actually write down my observations as they play out in the reality of life.

            Take now, for example. I am riding the bus to campus. The buses that take people here or there – from campus to home, home to work, or random, sundry appointments – are often more colorful that a midsummer sunset over Lake Michigan. White-skinned people are a minority here, and the most beautiful shades of brown, olive, and peach surround me – me, a blonde-haired, green-eyed twenty-something with skin that tans easily in the few summer months Michigan claims as its own.
            I like watching how people talk on the bus. There are two women about my age towards the front of the bus; both are talking with their hands and eyes, and laughter occasionally erupts from their mouths. I’m not really eavesdropping, but they’re discussing how difficult it is for one of them to get a raise at the job where she works.
            I love watching the Asian women on the bus when they’re deep in conversation. The younger woman has her hair parted in the middle and pulled back with a plastic barrette, and the older woman has her hair in a fashionable haircut. Their eyes are the most attentive, and these two women barely raise their voices above a library appropriate level.
            Then there is the occasional serious-type student, the person-in-the-crowd you don’t notice when they’re in-the-crowd, but as soon as they step away from the masses of humanity surrounding them, you can see them for who they are. This man-my-age across the aisle from me, for example; he’s reading a textbook full of built-in highlights, and nothing seems to be distracting him from studying – nothing, and everything. From what I can see, he’s just as interested in the conversation of the two ladies in the front of the bus, which has shifted from job raises to blood pressure, and has moved on to talking about someone joining the Peace Corps.
          This is where I get off to wait five minutes for the next bus.

manly men, and sheep

2010-09-27T20:24:00.000-07:00

It was encouraging tonight - especially tonight - to see an auditorium full of men. Assuredly, there were also women present (myself included), but a room almost full of men brings such ... hope. What a future to have so many manly men of God in the same room, thirsting for the words of the Creator / Shepherd, and desiring to be strengthened for better toolship. How encouraging to know that, like Elijah, there are "others out there." Although I am not a man nor am I a pastor, it was a blessing to be a part of such a large group of men seeking Him this evening, and being part of what will be infinitely better some day soon. What a blessing to be a part of the Body, when voices lift souls up to the throneroom, and the one Voice that needs to be heard is heard ever-so-clearly by the ones He has chosen. Praise Him for being such a Creator, and such a shepherd that - foolish though it may appear- chose to die for the creatures for whom He was caring, or, as Carson so humanly put it:

"I am the Good Shepherd... [Christ] gives His life for the sheep, then comes back from the dead and secures them!"

Post 124 - Unintentional Restaurant Review

2010-09-07T18:24:00.001-07:00

For Labor Day, I went to linner at the Twisted Rooster with Dan (who drove all the way up from Illinois) and then to the Frederick Meijer Gardens. The Twisted Rooster - where O'Charley's used to be right next to Applebee's on the Beltline - is a unique restaurant. It reminded me of the restaurant Lester, Jenny, and I went to in Mexico in our condo - not nostalgic, but trendy, hip, individualistic. The music was pretty modern and sports-barrish, but not too loud to have lots of great conversation with a neat guy. We arrived at the TR around 3pm and were promptly seated. We had about a 10-minute wait before anyone came to ask us about drinks, though. bua haha... Our server, when he came (yay!) was very friendly and helpful. We both ordered the Twisted Mac'n'cheese, a penne with asparagus, tomatoes, and a parmesan crackery crust on top. It was fantastic - not spicy, really, but quite filling. The best part was the several times when our server came by to check on us and Dan took his time answering - I think that made him nervous or something, and before we left he asked if we were food critics or something and if I was going to write about it on my blog. I said no I'm not a food blogger, but a teacher ... (he's going into secondary ed, hurrah teachers!), but now I feel like I have to write about our experience.

The Twisted Rooster is a great place to eat - we only looked at the lunch menu, but prices were reasonable and the restaurant is tastefully and fun-ly decorated.
Go check it out!

Barefoot / Helper By Design

2010-08-19T21:08:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I walked 1 1/2 miles down the road with no shoes on. How exciting it was to finally put my flipflops back on when I got to the end of the road : ) If it wasn't for dirty roads, i'd totally be doing that more often!
(Side note- one of my friends in college went barefoot all over the place. She is one of my heroines :) okay, un-sidenote)

I've been reading "Helper By Design" by Elyse Fitzgerald (borrowed from Jeri), and it's a great book so far. The author is very learned, and well-written. Basically (though I'm not that far in) it's an extrapolation (although I am not quite sure that is quite the word I want to use there) of the word "helpmeet" (KJV translation) in Genesis as referring to Eve.

:)

More to come, if I remember.
Also, my online class started, and I might have to buckle down and do very well in it this time around, seeing as the last class-and-a-half I wasn't even able to log on... ick.

Praising God for the summer "break," though. :) ..among other things.

6 Workout Mistakes that Slow Down Results (from Prevention)

2010-08-07T20:13:00.000-07:00

6 Workout Mistakes That Slow Down Results

Busting your butt without any progress? It's time to tweak your routine

By Liz Plosser

1. You Sacrifice Good Form

High-intensity exercise may burn loads of calories, but not if you're hanging on to the handrails for dear life. It is important to focus on your form, even if that means lowering the intensity. "You recruit fewer muscles and burn fewer calories when you're slouched over," says Coopersmith.

Same goes for strength-training, says James Levine, PhD, a scientist at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, MN, whose research has found that standing while lifting weights boosts calorie burn by about 50 calories per half hour. Best of all, one study shows that good posture allows you to take in more oxygen so your workout feels easier, even while you're blasting more calories.

Do: Slow down and stand tall
The Results: Burn 50 extra calories per session

2. You Exercise While Parched

Experts are constantly back and forth on the merits of the 8-glasses-a-day guideline. However, when it comes to working out, the importance of drinking up is clear. "Nearly every cell in the body is composed of water--without it, they don't function efficiently during exercise," says Dan Judelson, PhD, an assistant professor of kinesiology at California State University in Fullerton. Translation: You'll fatigue faster and your workout will feel tougher than it should.

In recent studies, he discovered that exercisers who were dehydrated completed 3 to 5 fewer reps per set while strength-training. Part of the problem is that dehydration decreases the body's levels of anabolic hormone that are necessary for strong muscles. On workout days, drink an ounce of water for every 10 pounds of body weight (i.e., 15 ounces if you weigh 150) 1 to 2 hours prior to exercise. Then keep sipping during and after your session to replenish what you lose through sweat.

Do: Sip 15 ounces of water 2 hours before working out
The Results: More energy to lift weights and firm up faster

You Read on the Treadmill

"If flipping through a magazine keeps you motivated, by all means do it," says Coopersmith. "But reading while exercising is so distracting that you're probably working at an intensity too low to burn a significant number of calories." Magazines and books are just the tip of the iceberg--1 in 10 of us reads texts or e-mail on a cell phone during workouts, reports a new survey by Standard Life, a health insurance company.

Instead, turn on some tunes to increase the duration and intensity of your cardio bout: Researchers at Brunel University in London discovered that runners who listened to motivational rock or pop music (think Queen or Madonna) exercised up to 15% longer--and felt better doing it. You don't have to nix TV shows, cell phones, books, and magazines every workout--just leave them behind a couple of times a week so you can focus on intensity.

Do: Listen to music
The Results: Burn 15% more calories

4. You Hate Your Workout

No matter how many calories an activity promises to burn, if you don't enjoy it, you'll be less likely to do it and won't reap the benefits. Think of it this way: If you burn 300 calories every time you exercise, but you dread it so much that you skip one session a week, it adds up to 1,200 calories a month--or more than 4 pounds a year.

Instead, find a workout you want to do, rather than one you feel like you have to do. When University of Nebraska-Omaha researchers polled women who'd been exercising regularly for longer than a year, they found that one of the top predictors of adherence was choosing enjoyable activities. Study author Jennifer Huberty, PhD, also suggests experimenting with ways tomake exercise more appealing: For example, if walking is your workout of choice, try recruiting a friend to join you.

Do: Pick a cardio routine that's fun
The Results: Lose 4 pounds a year

5. You Skip Strength Training

Over 80% of women forgo strength-training, says the latest survey by the Sporting Goods Manufacturers Association. If you're one of them, it may be the number one reason your scale is stuck. You've probably heard that strength-training can boost metabolism, but here's something you may not know: People who pair aerobic and resistance training eat less--517 fewer calories a day--than those who do only cardio, reports a new study in the Journal of Sports Science and Medicine. The combo workouts may increase satiety hormones more and boost the body's ability to break down food and stabilize blood sugar, so you feel full longer, says study author Brandon S. Shaw, PhD.

Do: Swap aerobic exercise for weights 3 times a week
The Results: Lose up to 12.5 pounds in a year

6. You Trust Calorie-Burn Estimates

Oh, how sweet it would be if 20 minutes on a cardio machine really did blast 400 calories. But like most things in life that sound too good to be true, those digital displays broadcasting mega calorie burn are often bogus. Recent research presented at the National Strength and Conditioning Conference found thatelliptical trainers over-estimate calorie burn by an average of 30%.

If you're trying to create a calorie deficit to lose weight, those thought-you-burned-'em calories can add up over time and thwart your success. To ensure you're burning the number of calories you want, consider investing in a heart rate monitor. We love the FT40 by Polar because it's a cinch to set up and use ($180; polarusa.com). Input some basic info (weight, height, age, activity level, and so on) and the gadget will accurately track your heart rate to compute the number of calories you torched. Or, for a free check of your cardio machine's readout, cross-reference your calorie burn by logging your session at prevention.com/fitnesstracker.

Do: Track your burn with a heart rate monitor
The Results: Lose 3 pounds this year

the kite runner -

2010-08-07T05:59:00.000-07:00

This weekend I watched the movie "The Kite Runner" (based on the book). The Kite Runner is one of Those Movies that evokes all 1200 possible female emotions. It is about a boy growing up in Afghanistan who is friends with a boy from lower-society, and their friendship that undergoes quite a bit. That's all I am going to write about it, actually, because until you have seen it for yourself, anything I write here will be a spoiler and might ruin the movie for you. (Or read the book).

So... this is a recommendation - especially if you are American! - to go read the book/watch the movie. It's PG-13, and has its reasons for being rated so, so beware, but it is an excellent, excellent story, and has some very beautiful cinematic scenage.

Name

2010-07-30T21:07:00.000-07:00

Ever since Andy mentioned the importance of the Name in the book of Acts (in establishing the church), I've been noticing it more in scripture...

for example,
Tim Sommers was talking about Malachi and the whole time he was talking to us, I couldn't really concentrate on what he was saying because the Name seemed to be trying to get my attention (sorry, Tim,... or am I?)
and we sing about this Name, and we tell stories about it - but is it really everything to us me?
I was thumbing through a (well-written) Bible story book for young, young children and noticed that this version of the story of "David and Goliath" didn't even mention that Goliath was bashing God's name (via the army's Name representers) in front of David... and that made me sad.
When such a powerful one-behind-the-Name exists, by ignoring or slandering or slighting His Name do we really think we are making Him any less?

accountability

2010-07-17T08:01:00.000-07:00

Here is a list of projects I am currently working on:

Ask me about them.

crocheted Fan blanket - for Jordan and Christee (about 3/4 finished!)

crocheted driving cap - for uncle Joe (the assembly instructions were terrible...)

hexagon hope chest quilt (because i am insane) - about less than 1' x 1' currently sewn together; lots of pieced hexagons ready, though.

cross stitch from forever ago...

crewel from a few years ago...

two braid crochet blankets ...

Bucket List - Updated

2010-07-06T12:09:00.005-07:00

Original can be found here; a few changes have been made, as well as a few additions :)

My Bucket List of Resolutions as a 20-something:

short term: years 26 to 30, ‘Til He Returns / or Calls Me Home:

GOALS FOR MY 26^TH THROUGH 30^TH YEARS (in no particular order) --> and some longer-term goals, as well.

Delight in my Lord daily, not getting discouraged when I fail or things don’t “go my way.”

This isn't always easy, I've learned. The things of this world can get in the way of time I need and need to crave with the Creator. However, the time I do make to spend with Him is always a blessing. Sometimes I have to steal time from other, also-important things to make time for the Word, and I am still learning my priorities. Don't be disappointed if one day soon I don't "want" to hang out with you because I need to do something... :) it's a good thing.

As far as not being discouraged with disappointments, it's not easy for me to keep a genuine smile on my face, but He's taught me that it's okay to mess up. I just got back from a trip to Traverse City - by bike. The last day of the trip, my body wouldn't let me go any further - with only 20 miles to go. I was pretty mad at myself at first, but after reflecting on the grace God gave me the first three days of riding - and how each new day seemed a little easier, even with ginormous hills! - "With my God, I can scale a wall! (ps 18:29) I am able to see that delighting in God is far better than delighting in my strength- or lack thereof. Simply being able to ride my bike for at least 50 miles a day? Only His gift, on any given day.
There have been other disappointments, too, but with each disappointment that comes my way, two choices also seem to appear: Do I turn to God for advice, or to man? The times that I turn to man before God usually turn into harder times, and those times when I turn to God - or to God via His people - I have better hindsight and He gives wisdom as needed.

Learn OT Greek
a little hiatus from this, simply due to trying to find a job. I love languages, though... *sigh. If things work out, though, this fall I should have a little more time to study. :)
Keep praying for and writing to Ol’ Whoever He May Be, and wait patiently for the Lord to smack him upside the head and get his booty over here… I mean, Wait on the Lord for His choice. ;)

Still praying/writing to this fellow, but no sign of him yet. The end goal? a man who seeks God's face first before mine (= more patience on my part, and more time spent seeking God's face for myself!!) ...also, Praying for him helps keep my heart in check, and my eyes on the one who made me as the true Lover of my face. Saving my kisses for him also keeps my mind away from dwellation on things of the flesh.

Start an actual group for people (not just women) to learn to crochet: as ministry, outreach, and fellowship:

God has blessed my desire and passion with this already, and the Tabitha Club has been a lot of fun and a great way to connect with women of all ages! I’ve also been able to teach several people the basics of crochet! ... Haven't done this in a few months, though, because it's been a busy year!!

See the Grand Canyon - again. and also more of the Western states - CA, OR, WA, NV, ID...

Next time, though, I am taking someone with me. Big things like that are much better shared! ... Addition: I am saving coins for something akin to this.

Lose 40 lbs.

I have lost about 30 so far!!

Get a master's degree and my teacher’s certificate

Halfway done, but now I've hit a snag. Going to pause to earn some money to finish... meh! :)

End Goal: teaching certificate so I can get an actual Teaching Job wherever He can best use me!

Run a marathon.

I am going to train for the Grand Rapids Half-Marathon in October, by running and working on my core - to see if that keeps my hips/knees from dying on me. I finished the Riverbank Run: 10K edition May 8, 2010. Yay!! This will help me beat my body into submission, because I don’t want to be a pear on my 30^th birthday. Hehe.

Shoot something besides skeet

I want to get a hunter’s license and shoot something. And say “I shot a something” and not just be telling tall tales. I am working on getting into a hunter’s safety class to get this one started... Also, looking for people who want to go with me?? JA

Write a book

I’ve started numerous books, but for some reason cannot get past the first few chapters. Disciplining myself with daily and weekly writing goals will help me hone my writing skills. Hence, part of why I blog…

Be a better listener and a better questioner

I want to learn how to listen better because so many people come to me for advice (yikes!) and yet I still somehow let myself get distracted by the things of this world rather then dropping what I deem necessary to give myself to the people that trust me with their souls. I also want to learn to be better at asking questions that make sense, especially if no one else is doing the asking in a group of people.

Spoil my nieces and nephews

…But in a good way. I want to use the time God’s given me to bear my friends’ burdens, helping out where I can and when I can, and encouraging them in being the best mums and dads they can. Even though I’m not a parent, I can ease their burdens by listening, visiting, sending packages, and washing dishes.

Be more consistent with my written correspondence

I enjoy writing letters and notes to people, but so often I let other things get in the way; Getting things in the mail besides bills can be the highlight of a terrible day, and I love being able to be a tiny part of a smile on someone’s face. J I can understand Paul when he said, “I long to see you, that I may impart unto you some spiritual gift, to the end ye may be established; that is, that I may be comforted together with you by the mutual faith both of you and me.”

Memorize the book of Romans.

I am currently in chapter 2!

Study Navajo and Arabic, and keep up with my Spanish and Russian

I love languages, and how they work; I have a few books I would love to work on while I “have time,” I would like to learn at least the basics – phonics, grammatical structure,

Go to Turkmenistan, or at least South America

I might not make it to Central Asia (monetarily) in five years, but eventually I would love to go there. Call me nuts, but ever since I did my 10/40 window project on that country in my senior year of high school, that country has held a special place in my heart. That is also part of why I took Russian… And for some reason, I have fallen in love with the desrt. Not just in Arizona, but one of my favorite parts of Israel - where I was blessed to go over Spring Break this year - was the Negev. : )
And if an opportunity arises, I’d love to go to a country in SA or CA, specifically somewhere in the Andes where there are indigenous peoples. We could crochet together.

Have my “own place” again…

There’s nothing wrong with living at home, but it’s harder to have people over spontaneously to feed them or randomly workout, or just to have secret conversations about all things under the sun,… Basically, I just want my own place for ministry purposes, and a place to keep books... not yet, though. Patience, Iago! ;)

Go to a few more National Parks – namely, Yellowstone, Glacier, Arches, and revisit Theodore Roosevelt (North and South Units!) And also perhaps visit Alaska.

I love that God put so much detail into the world He formed, and the few national parks I’ve been to have opened my eyes to how Big He is. I also just miss the sky.

Make my own version of Edwards’ Resolutions: hence, this list.

He was younger than I when he resolved such-and-such, and having something in writing will keep me accountable. Also, anyone reading this must needs feel freely obligated to ask me how things are progressing in the various bullets J

Romans Road Day 1 -all people know God ...

2010-06-26T20:42:00.007-07:00

I am working on memorizing Romans (as part of my short-term 30-something bucket list) and I just need to share what I'm learning. I guess I'll call it the Romans Road, because i am ... digesting as i walk (?) it.

Along with memorization, I am listening through Piper's Romans series. The title of this post comes from this sermon :) He talks about Romans 1:19 - [for the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who hold the truth in unrighteousness] because that which may be known of God is manifest in them; for God hath shewed it unto them.

An excerpt you MUST read:
"All people know God

Step two: All the men and women and young people in the urban center of Minneapolis know God. Verse 21a: "They knew God." There is a profound common ground between you and everyone you will ever meet in this city. Yes, the truth is suppressed, but it is there, buried and distorted. God has not left himself without a witness - to every mind and heart. You will not be talking to trees. You will be talking to people who look at trees and see the glory of God. They know God - his eternal power and deity.

3. But they suppress this knowledge

Step three: Nevertheless, they suppress this knowledge and do not glorify God or give him thanks (verse 21b). This means at least that, since you love the glory of God and want him to receive the worship he is due, you will labor with all your strength in the power of God's Spirit to open their hearts to the truth and spread a passion for the supremacy of God in all things for the joy of all peoples.

4. So, everyone is without excuse before God

Step four: Everyone in urban Minneapolis and St. Paul, and indeed every person on this planet, is "without excuse" under the wrath of God. Nobody can bring any legitimate protest against God's justice in this matter. This means, Kenny, that the great urban tragedy is not drugs or illicit sex or murder or theft or poverty or homelessness or abuse. The great urban tragedy is that people are perishing under the wrath of God with no appeal and no hope. They are without excuse."

Praise Yahweh that He made a way for this Gentile to be part of the daughters of Sarah, and part of the everlasting kingdom :)

And if you DO have any extra time this week, give this sermon a listen : ) click the link above to read it, and search the area to download the .mp3 free!! :)

I will never . . .

2010-06-16T20:48:00.005-07:00

There are some things I know without a doubt that I will never be.

There are some things I am still learning that I will never be, praise His unchanging name!

I will never be a man.

I will never be a son.

I will never be a father.

I will never be a grandfather.

I will never be an uncle.

I will never be a nephew.

I will never be a deacon.

I will never be a pastor.

I will never be the president of the United States of America.

I will never be abandoned.

I will never be deserted.

I will never be forsaken.

I will never be hungry.

I will never be thirsty.

I will never be cast into utter darkness where there is weeping and gnashing of teeth.

I will never understand all the Creator and Redeemer (among so many other descriptive names!) has done for me.

I will never be snatched from the hands of YHWH.

I will never die.

5.35 miles at Huff Park

2010-05-04T06:07:00.002-07:00

I think I am going to start writing my mileage on here, as well. That way I can keep track of it on a paperless, harder-to-lose format. ... and if you wanted a running buddy, you can use me. :)

So ... yesterday I ran at Huff Park. 5 "laps" around the boardwalk / wooded / paved paths. Each lap is 1.07 miles. The beginning of the trail usually has a small puddle, but it rained two days ago and the lower, sagging parts of the boardwalk were a little... moist, so i had to take a walk-through-that-part. .. ... and still ended up soaking my shoes... haha.

it was a good run, though. i had my Sony on shuffle, and a lot of Shane came up, and some Relient K, and Switchfoot. So, it was "slower music," but it kept me going :) I'm not doing very well as far as speed, but that's okay. I think as long as I can persevere, that'll come in due time. I might not ever be as fast as some people, at least right now, but looking back to a year ago,.... and i can run 3, or 4, or 5 miles without stopping now? God is good!

It was perfect running weather... not too humid or hot, but just warm enough, and just windy enough to keep the sweat from getting in my eyes ;)

Hints from the Past

2010-05-04T05:26:00.003-07:00

I found this book (Good Housekeeping's Guide for Young Homemakers)(1966) last summer because it's always fun to see what people wanted to know in the "past." This is quite a fun read!
I might be sharing more than just this excerpt in the future! :)
.
.
.
.

"Here are a few of the simpler problems women complain about, followed by trouble-shooting measures. Have you ever wondered:

Why the refrigerator or freezer door is suddenly so hard to open?
The last time you closed it, you probably slammed it just hard enough to create a partial vacuum.

Why a sewing machine jams or tangles on the first few stitches?

This happens when you don't start properly. Begin sewing with the needle at its highest point, and hold the thread ends to the back for the first stitch or two. Don't push or pull the fabric.

Why a vacuum cleaner won't pick up dirt?

the brush is worn, or packed with dirt and threads, or, more likely, the cleaner is just too full of dirt. The efficiency of and vacuum cleaner drops way down when the bag is more than half full.

Why the toast sometimes just won't toast.

If you have a good toaster, this happens because of low voltage. Within your house or in your area, there just isn't enough power, especially during peak use, as at breakfast time. Turn off some lights or other appliances and it may work.

How to cut out unnecessary repair bills?

First, of course, never buy from a dealer who cannot direct you to an authorized parts and service agency. Buy only when you have assurance that good service will be available when you need it; and see to it that expert installation gets you off to a good start.

Never call before you check the instruction book.

After you've read it (and some of them are mighty heavy going) keep it handy - always. Along with the facts you must know to get the most from your machine, there's a list of points to check before you call for help. The melting freezer that's simply unplugged, the oven that won't turn on because the clock was flipped from "manual" to "automatic" in cleaning - these things can happen.

Don't fight an appliance.

It doesn't pay. People have been known to kick, shake, punch, and carve up appliances - with provocation, perhaps. But the records show that some homes call for more than average service attention, and rough handling is suspected. Appliances are not particularly delicate, but they do contain parts that work better and longer with reasonably respectful care. It is worthwhile to be especially gentle when you are removing, cleaning and replacing parts, turning dials and switches, opening and closing doors and lids.

My list

2010-04-15T15:33:00.003-07:00

While cleaning my room, I came across a list of standards for "him" I'd compiled during my freshman year at MSU...

In no particular order, here are my standards from back then... I have a few others on another sheet of paper, but these are from one 3x4 notebook page. They are also a challenge to myself.
Here 'tis: 1. Seeks God's will 2. strong, growing Christian 3. being "discipled" by someone (or has someone he can ask difficult questions, study the Word, etc.) 4. listens / talks (knows when to do either) 5. honest 6. willing to work hard 7. doesn't drink / smoke 8. friends with guys & girls 9. loves his family 10. desires to serve ("rises to the bottom") 11. loves kids (and kids love him).

Can't Touch This!

2010-04-02T05:04:00.004-07:00

There is nothing - no circumstance, no trouble, no testing - that can ever touch me until, first of all it has gone past God and past Christ, right through me. If it has come that far, it has come with a great purpose, which I may not understand at the moment. But as I refuse to become panicky, as i lift up my eyes to Him and accept it as coming from the throne of God for some great purpose of blessing to my own heart, no sorrow will ever disturb me, no trial will ever disarm me, no circumstance will cause me to fret - for I shall rest in the joy of what my Lord is - that is the rest of victory.
~based on Romans 8:28-29, by Alan Redpath (former pastor of Moody Church)

Edwards on diverse excellencies found in Christ

2010-03-22T05:12:00.003-07:00

Key Points from Jonathan Edwards' The Excellency of Christ. (Click the link to listen/download!)

There is an admirable conjunction of diverse excellencies in Jesus Christ:

Infinite glory and lowest humility meet in the person of Christ - He is both lion AND (slain) lamb!

In Christ are conjoined absolute sovereignty & perfect resignation...

In Christ is [conjoined] self-sufficiency and an entire trust an reliance which is on God...

In Christ meet the deepest reverence toward God & equality with God...

In Christ meet an exceeding spirit of obedience with supreme dominion over heaven and earth

[in His greatest act of obedience to God, He was treated as the worst kind of person!]
and finally,

Christ never so much appeared as a lamb as when He was slain.

Some words He used in this sermon: (click for definitions!)
ignominy
ignominious
appellation
potentate

money time!

2010-03-19T04:54:00.003-07:00

I've been following a few thrifty heroes, and wanted to share some deals I thought you'd like (especially if you're a coupon-clipper).

From faithfulprovisions:

WALMART:

Degree Girl Deodorant — $1.97
- $3/2 Degree deodorant printable
Final Price: $0.47/ea wyb 2

OFFICEMAX:

http://www.faithfulprovisions.com/2010/03/15/office-max-maxperks-freebies-case-of-paper-sharpies-envelopes-binders-storage-box-and-manilla-folders/

(Get lots of rebates, so basically $50 of free stuff with your maxperks .... )

Re: The Slough of Despond, and Moses

2010-03-18T20:11:00.005-07:00

I need to share this, because many of you may be going through that very 20/30-something slump of "how'd i get here" or "meh" or just plain feel like you're in a dry, unsatisfactory wilderness of discouragement. There may be a personal reason for the "meh times," as I may refer to them, or the sole reason might just be to bring glory to the Creator of 1)your minutiae and 2)the furthest, largest galaxies.

This is from October 13 of Chambers' My Utmost, and is taken from this website.

Individual Discouragement and Personal Growth

. . . when Moses was grown . . . he went out to his brethren and looked at their burdens —Exodus 2:11

Moses saw the oppression of his people and felt certain that he was the one to deliver them, and in the righteous indignation of his own spirit he started to right their wrongs. After he launched his first strike for God and for what was right, God allowed Moses to be driven into empty discouragement, sending him into the desert to feed sheep for forty years. At the end of that time, God appeared to Moses and said to him, " ’. . . bring My people . . . out of Egypt.’ But Moses said to God, ’Who am I that I should go . . . ?’ " ( Exodus 3:10-11 ). In the beginning Moses had realized that he was the one to deliver the people, but he had to be trained and disciplined by God first. He was right in his individual perspective, but he was not the person for the work until he had learned true fellowship and oneness with God.

We may have the vision of God and a very clear understanding of what God wants, and yet when we start to do it, there comes to us something equivalent to Moses’ forty years in the wilderness. It’s as if God had ignored the entire thing, and when we are thoroughly discouraged, God comes back and revives His call to us. And then we begin to tremble and say, "Who am I that I should go . . . ?" We must learn that God’s great stride is summed up in these words— "I AM WHO I AM . . . has sent me to you" ( Exodus 3:14 ). We must also learn that our individual effort for God shows nothing but disrespect for Him— our individuality is to be rendered radiant through a personal relationship with God, so that He may be "well pleased" ( Matthew 3:17 ). We are focused on the right individual perspective of things; we have the vision and can say, "I know this is what God wants me to do." But we have not yet learned to get into God’s stride. If you are going through a time of discouragement, there is a time of great personal growth ahead.

dabbling with fire

2010-02-17T21:35:00.001-07:00

dabbling with fire

The quietness and solitude
The sunsets –oh! the sunsets!
Being alone on the top of the world,

so close to the sun, well -
i wish i could paint.

How is it that there is red wool
in the sky
scattered about
for miles and miles?

/
or
\

How is it that all the white clouds
are scattered in the blue sky for miles?

the art i see in you

2010-02-17T21:30:00.001-07:00

the art I see in you

(not the art that is your body)

makes me cry.

(not because i’m sad but…)

it’s so beautiful
to see a grown boy love
from deep inside.

that is art.

written sometime around the turn of the millennium.
© Amanda E Johnson

On being a slave

2010-02-17T21:23:00.003-07:00

I found this bit while cleaning my room... written approximately 2004? ... I knew i was meant to be a rapper or something ;)

On being a slave

~Manda Johnson

Sometime's it's not all it's cracked up to be

You know, seeing people shun you + me;

Pursuing holiness, faith, hope, + love

Trying to serve our great God up above.

It's not always easy; quite often it's hard
This living for Jesus thing hurts like a shard.

Dying to self more and more ev'ry day
Always re-learning our need to obey.

Falling down more + more, or so it seems
I find myself wishing this life was a dream.
Struggles for righteousness cut like a knife
Draining false emotion out of my life.

Yet if someone asked why I live This way
I know even now what my herat would say

All my ties to this earth are being spliced

As my heart is becoming one with Christ's.

projects as of late...

2010-02-16T08:09:00.000-07:00

Lately I am (still) working on:

pillowcase dresses galore!!

sheet-strippy-quilts

afghans:
-Baby Rebecca (almost done!)

-Christee and Jordan (I can take longer on this one, because their wedding date keeps changing!)

-Vincent's 100"

-Kelli & Dennis

-Baby Weeks

Finished:

Christine and Buck!

Sunday Night - an ode to sheep herders.

2010-01-02T14:41:00.003-07:00

Frances Ridley Havergal wrote a poem entitled "Sunday Night" that you really must read. While reading it, think about all the pastors you know that have spoken the truth to you; this is for them.

So I have copied and pasted it here for you, or you can click the above link to find the webpage it was originally found. (well, actually, there was an excerpt in "Lone Point," a novel by GLH.

******************

REST him, O Father! Thou didst send him forth
With great and gracious messages of love;
But Thy ambassador is weary now,
Worn with the weight of his high embassy.
Now care for him as Thou hast cared for us
In sending him ; and cause him to lie down
In Thy fresh pastures, by Thy streams of peace.
Let Thy left hand be now beneath his head,
And Thine upholding right encircle him,
And, underneath, the Everlasting arms
Be felt in full support. So let him rest,
Hushed like a little child, without one care,
And so give Thy beloved sleep to-night.

Rest him, dear Master! He hath poured for us
The wine of joy, and we have been refreshed.
Now fill his chalice, give him sweet new draughts
Of life and love, with Thine own hand; be Thou
His ministrant to-night; draw very near
In all Thy tenderness and all Thy power.
Oh speak to him! Thou knowest how to speak
A word in season to Thy weary ones,
And he is weary now. Thou lovest him--
Let Thy disciple lean upon Thy breast,
And, leaning, gain new strength to 'rise and shine.'

Rest him, O loving Spirit! Let Thy calm
Fall on his soul to-night. O holy Dove,
Spread Thy bright wing above him, let him rest
Beneath its shadow; let him know afresh
The infinite truth and might of Thy dear name--
'Our Comforter!' As gentlest touch will stay
The strong vibrations of a jarring chord,
So lay Thy hand upon his heart, and still
Each overstraining throb, each pulsing pain.
Then, in the stillness, breathe upon the strings,
And let Thy holy music overflow
With soothing power his listening, resting soul.

50 Things From the Past Decade of my life. (He's Been Faithful)

2009-12-10T21:34:00.006-07:00

This is stolen from Holly - I was ruther inspired by her post on FB, and I am going to attempt my own list. Especially since,... In one week I am turning 26! So from the tail end of my 15th year until now, here goes!

1. I played the piccolo in pep band, and really enjoyed "Stars and Stripes Forever" because of the piccolo solo (soli, but there was only myself on the picc!)

2. My family and I traveled to Maine and took a boat ride and saw seals basking in the sun.

3. My younger cousin was the first of the girl cousins to get married and now has three children.

4. I went to Spain for a weekish with some peeps from Spanish class. The only Spanish I really used was at Subway (the food chain)

5. I had three different dishes featuring octopus while in Spain.

6. I gave flute lessons to a younger student.

7. I played a solo in Solo and Ensemble and did ... decently =)

8. I was really into classical music in high school.

9. I had a few crushes, but none of the guys I liked were mutually interested...

10. I may have broken a few hearts by having high standards.

11. I still haven't kissed anyone...

12. I worked at Red Hot Inn and did basically everything possible while there.

13. God gave me a burden for the people I worked with at Red Hot.

14. I filled up several prayer journals while in high school, under Pastor John's influence, and rediscovering them a month ago was one of the best things to have happened this year.

15. I went to Homecoming and had one of the most fun, amazing nights ever (thanks, Chris!) along with being told I looked beautiful by a boy before I left

16. I participated in Bible Quizzing and learned tons and got out of my comfort zone.

17. I attended Reborne Rangers at Lake Ann Camp and really saw God pull a group of 60ish youngsters together for His glory.

18. I discussed entomology with God while at Reborne Rangers and heard Him telling me that I could be a lightbulb for Him while studying entomology.

19. Because of entomology, I applied to MSU, and MSU alone. ...

20. I was accepted into MSU (Michigan state) and started classes in the fall of 2002.

21. In high school, Christee and I met almost every day before school in Mr. Lameyer's room to pray. It was amazing. I miss that.

22. Also in HS, I stuck with the same small group at West Cannon (after switching churches) for three years. God used those girls to bring me closer to Him. (Sex is good, sex is great, sex can wait!)

23. I went to Teen Leadership Conference (again, in HS) and God spent a lot of time convicting me about boys...

24. God brought me into a great group of college students on campus.

25. I met one of my best friends at MSU, and Kelli's stuck with me ever sense!

26. Kel and I were BOTH devastated by a male . . . but God used it for our good.

27. (Through that,) I learned that forgiveness is not instant, but it is possible.

28. In college, I learned about the importance of discipleship and accountability.

29. I worked in the cafeteria in Brody Hall, which is like the largest non-military cafeteria or something.

30. I made lots of friends in the cafeteria, and got away with a lot. . . ;)

31. I switched to student maintenance and God gave me a burden and mission field for/with those boys.

32. I discovered the importance of keeping old friends "back home" while making new ones.

33. God pointed out Hebrews 12:3 to me on a Therefore summer retreat when we were up near Mackinaw City, and brought me out of a spiritually dry spell.

34. I changed churches in the last semester of college and started attending a really small church, along with Joey, who started college the semester I was finishing up.

35. I watched almost all of my close friends get married, and the majority of "everyone else" got married as well. I remain single.

36. I can view my singleness as a blessing, and am learning to take advantage of this time for His glory.

37. I served with ACMNP (A Christian Ministry in the National Parks) during the summer of 2008 and made like a gazillion friends, learned about the tourist industry, and hiked the badlands.

38. I biked the Mah Dah Hey trail for 5 or so miles. And walked my bike through the Little Missouri River - It came up to my waist or so...

39. I had a real, salaried job, if only for a year.

40. I taught Spanish to students that could have cared less about Spanish, but saw so many improvements because of God's grace and my attempts to listen to broken, hurting hearts.

41. I learned to love my students more than myself, and spent countless hours crying, praying, and making up my own text, tests, lessons, and games.

42. I learned the answer to the ultimate question. ;)

43. I've learned through trial and error that even though Skype, email, cell phones, and snail mail exist, nothing beats talking in person, even though snail mail comes in at a close second.

44. I've come to really like snuggling with people.

45. I started my Master's degree... one of the benefits of being single.

46. I was invited to a Bible study "Down the Road" by a friend and have been stretched beyond my imagination and made some amazing new friends.

47. I participated in the Journibles guinea pig test group :)

48. I stood up as bridesmaid in two of my friends' weddings (three this spring)

49. I get to watch almost everyone else have babies, and I am still... single, and my womb is still... empty; however, I know God is faithful, and what He has planned for me is far greater than anything I can type or imagine.

50. I am still learning to trust Him everyday, but like the song says, "every day with Jesus is sweeter than the day before," and the more time I spend in the word, the more I want to only spend time with Him.

important trifles

2009-12-09T18:02:00.002-07:00

I have been modifying my vocabulary - reading King James' English helps much, as does watching videos of intellectuals... It's always fun to circumnavigate (iron sharpens iron / friends sharpen friends!) until a definition is created.
:-D

Here are some words I am working with lately, followed by their definitions.

See if you can match them!

1. misogyny a. to shed rays of light upon; illuminate; to illumine intellectually or spiritually

2. ineffable b. The act of taking; reception

3. susception c. mournful, dismal, or gloomy, esp. in an affected, exaggerated, or unrelieved manner; Mournful, dismal, or gloomy, especially to an exaggerated or ludicrous degree.

4. discharge d. highly distinguished; renowned; famous; glorious; luminous; bright

5. irradiate(d) / irradiating e. hatred, dislike, or mistrust of women.

6. illustrious f. Still trying to find a good definition for this one, as www.dictionary.com says it's not a word but quite a few peoples have used it ...

7. infallacy g. to pour forth,emit; to relieve of obligation, responsibility; to remove or send forth.

8. lugubrious h. incapable of being expressed or described in words

for the answers, hit up the bottom of the page.

not yet

almost

soon

ANSWERS:

1.e 2. h 3. b 4. g 5. a 6. d 7. f 8. c

Not that it really matters, but:

2009-12-08T21:14:00.004-07:00

We all know your name. We all know your birthday, what color your eyes are, what your favorite food is. I’m not going to ask those dumb questions. Instead…

--Any names your parents were thinking about that you would prefer?
IDK, my bff Rose?

--If you had to pick one outfit that you currently own to wear for the rest of your life, what would it consist of?
jeans and a shirt, with a sweatshirt, knee socks, and flip flops in case it's warm. Also, shorts. because i am a Michigander at heart, and I change clothes a LOT.

--What do you think is going to happen to you after you die?
My heart will live on ... well, I'll get a new body and spend the rest of forever with the One Who Breathes Stars and became human to take the consequences of my sin ... :- )

--What TV show have you seen every episode of?
Mr. Bean (it's only one season!) and Crossing Jordan and Gilmore Girls.

--What movie can you quote every line to?
no? I can quote a good number of line-age from A Princess Bride, Monty Python and the Holy grail, and Robin Hood: Men in Tights. Also, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

--What bands have you seen in concert?
Five Iron Frenzy, Bleach, Holland, Sara Groves, Bebo Norman, GoFish, Fernando Ortega (<3!) MercyMe, Monk & Neagle

--What bands would you like to see in concert?
Brian Regan (haha), TSO, Shane and Shane,

--If you had the money to retire anywhere in the world, where would you go?
Retire? erm,... out west in the winter, Michigan in the summer. and most of the winter. Depending on my ligaments. :-p

--Is there a piece of jewelry or something similar that if you lost, you would feel naked?
sometimes my ring. or chapstick.

--What is one thing [appearance-wise or other] you would change about yourself?
my vision, but that'll change someday :)

--One thing you would change about your best friend?
Nothing!

--Everyone remembers their first birthday party that involved friends. Describe yours.
we popped balloons with our bottoms. it was fun :)

--What do you think is the perfect age and why?
every day with Jesus is sweeter than the day before =)

--If you could go back in time and change your first kiss, would you?
no. because... it hasn't happened.

--How many times have you said “I love you” to someone of the opposite sex [romantically] and meant it?
zero! (in my head, though, fifteen million! ha. )

--How many times have you said it and not meant it?
That would be zero.

--Which member of your family has the biggest influence on your life?
Me mum.

--If you won a $1,000 shopping spree to one store, what store would you want it to be?
TJ MAxx

--Which is your favorite comic book movie [The Hulk, Spiderman, Ironman, etc]?
Ironman. =-)

--What do you think this phrase means: “I am drearily bloodletting this bedwetting cosmonaut”?
That Russian is SICK!

--If you could go back in time and relive one memory – relive it, not change it – what memory would it be?
TWIRP with Chris, Brian, and Teresa. That was pretty neato.

--How old were you when you learned how to ride a bike?
I think my friend Amy was in 2nd or 3rd grade, and she was a grade ahead of me. She taught me some stuff...

--Who taught you?
see prior Q

--When you go to the movies, do you like to get candy or popcorn?
i only like popcorn on occasion at the movies... :-p I bring M&Ms, or sometimes buy nachos.

-Describe the first real party you ever went to [i.e. first party with alcohol].
Wow... shallow ;) Us church kids partied hard without substances.

--If you’ve never been to one, explain why not.
Also, see prior Q's A.

--Did/do you like high school? Why or why not?
a little. Pep band, great teachers, Spanish class...

--Do you have ONE best friend, who stands out among all the others, that’s been there for you seemingly forever?
Christee n Kelli

--If so, who is it?
^^^^

--If not, do you prefer having just a group of good friends, or would you like to have that one best friend?
yes

--Do you prefer the sound of electric, acoustic, or steel guitar?
depends on the song. I like me some country, some men's voices, and some hard rock.

--Have you ever read the Bible – even just a little part of it?
Yes :) And the more I read, the thrstier I get! :)

--Have you ever read the Koran?
Nopers

--What was the best pet you’ve ever had?
Dolly! (*Giant African Millipede)

--Out of all the states you’ve visited/lived in, which is your favorite?
Michigan, because I spent a large portion of life here. ... and there's humidity. Which is good for me. : )

--Do you enjoy jigsaw puzzles?
Yes!

--If you were allowed one murder without punishment, would you do it?
I'm a depraved creature, let's not say I haven't thought about it. :- (

--Where do you keep your wallet when you’re out and about?
everything. Unless Max (my friends' kiddo) goes through it and looks at stuff inside ;) Then it's in his hands :-p haha.

--Have you ever seen a ghost?
Boone's Restaurant in TC, yes! :- o or my camera exposure. hahaha.

--How about seen things happen that you think were caused by a ghost?
tv!

--Did you have Beanie Babies as a kid?
a few. ... And got a few when i was older. Well, it didn't really Happen until I was in at least junior high lols.

--Did you have tag protectors for their tags, or did you just rip the tags off?
yes, but i didn't really care. lol.

--Do you prefer stripes or polka dots?
both, but mostly polka dots. onthings, not clothing =-)

--What’s the best Christmas present you ever received?
I like them all equally. haha... erm, my luggage? kitchen gadgets? :- )

--Which of your birthdays was the most memorable?
My 20th, I think it was - The last LOTR was in theaters and I saw it with a bunch of peeps. :) And wore my new boots that made me taller :)

--Name one song you can play on an instrument – any instrument.
A Lot of Stuff on my flutie

--Who taught you to play that song?
a book. a few of them. :)

--Out of all the teachers you’ve had, who had the biggest influence on you?
Mr. Lameyer and Señorita Rigueiro

--Have you ever ridden on a motorcycle?
on a minibike. ... i drove.

--How about a moped?
nopers!

--When you were little, what was your favorite Disney movie?
Maybe Beauty and the Beast or Little Mermaid?

--What’s your favorite Disney movie now?
Beauty and the Beast!

--On the opposite sex, do you prefer muscles, average size, or scrawny bodies?
a few muscles, not the creepy kind, and a big heart.

--What’s the best gift you’ve ever received from a significant other?
waiting for me ? :-p

--What’s your favorite kind of chips?
BBQ, or baked something. Or carrots. :-p

--That you know of, do you have any famous ancestors?
John (Quincy) Adams

--Did you ever beg your parents for a pony?
who knows...

--Would you rather be blind or deaf?
deaf, because... I love seeing what I can see, and I have terrible vision as it is... alright, that sounds just plain weird.

--Is there someone you’ve been enemies with since you were little, and it’s never changed despite growing up and becoming more mature?
no.

--What laundry soap do you think smells the best?
that one

--Do you prefer Spongebob or Patrick?
neither. eww. ewww. ewwww.

--If you’re currently dating someone, would you be ready to elope with them right now if they asked?
not

--If you’re not dating someone, can you think of one person that you would elope with right now if they asked?
no. I want a real wedding. with all my girlies at my side.

--Who do you think is the hottest actor/actress in Hollywood right now?
Gerard Butler and Jeffrey Dean Morgan. I heart accents!

--Do you watch The Office?
yes, mainly online because we hath not television.

--If you don’t, have you at least seen one episode?
:)

--If you haven’t, are you aware that you should be brutally punished?
hahaha

--What’s the stupidest TV show on the air right now?
Deal or No Deal

--Have you ever written a song or a poem?
poems spewed forth rapidly from mine heart in high school...

--If you have, have you ever written a song or a poem for someone?
yes. For a homeless guy, for aborted babies, etc.

--Last but not least, type some funny or inspiring lyrics as a closing:
She sees love where everyone else would see weeds,

dandelions - You see flowers in these weeds =-) (Five Iron Frenzy)

Upside-Down French Toast (with coffee!)

2009-11-27T12:46:00.000-07:00

Suggested as a "second-wind breakfast / second breakfast" for 2 or 4;

Menu:
1. UPSIDE-DOWN FRENCH TOAST

2. COFFEE OR TEA*

*Use cold water when brewing coffee - it has fewer impurities, according to the Coffee Brewing Institute.

Upside-Down French Toast

Ingredients:

2 Tbsp butter

1/4 c. brown sugar

1/4 c. crushed pineapple

1 egg

3/4 c. milk

1/8 tsp. salt

4 slices bread

1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

2. Melt 2 tablespoons butter in a 9-inch square baking pan.

3. Into the butter stir 1/4 cup brown sugar and 1/4 cup crushed pineapple, drained of almost all its syrup.

4. Spread this mixture evenly over bottom of pan.

5. In a bowl beat together 1 egg, 3/4 cup milk, and 1/8 teaspoon salt.

6. Soak 4 slices bread in milk mixture until soft, then lay over the pineapple and brown sugar in the pan.

7. Bake for 25 minutes, or until lightly browned, and cool 1 minute before inverting on a heated serving platter.

way old new Christmas cards!

2009-11-27T11:19:00.000-07:00

I just found this neat idea - and a great way to get rid of clutter HERE. :)

(re-using old [Christmas or other] cards to make cute, new ones!)

props!

*also, I shall post some newer-completed-project pictures soon. :-)

bits and pieces

2009-11-26T10:16:00.002-07:00

I am going through my old papers and tossing them into the recycle; however, I want to save some of the thoughts and words I found therein. Some of them are my own, others are pieces of sermons heard while on the road and may or may not have original authors' names applied (unintentionally, of course, because highway driving is only conducive to so much writing before accidental lane-changes ;) )So this may seem very bits-and-pieces, but that's what it is. Mayhap it shall inspire conversation to the furthering of sanctification; if that is so, God be praised!

"I do not set aside the grace of God, for if righteousness could be gained through the law, Christ died for nothing."

~Does that mean Christ promotes sin?
~~It becomes evident that we ourselves are sinners.

"Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you, and ordained you, that ye should go & bring forth fruit, and that your fruit should remain: that whatsoever ye shall ask of the Father in my name, He may give it you." - John 15:16

In the very act of believing, you are experiencing God's begetting. {Left to yourself and your deadness, you will not believe!} -Piper

ANTINOMIANISM: (Antinomianism comes from two Greek words: antimeans against and nomos means law. So antinomianism means against the law, against God's moral law. It means lawlessness.)

"I want to live all You died for me to be" -Ray Boltz

Labor is easy to those of a cheerful spirit.

twins in community

2009-11-24T13:11:00.003-07:00

A friend recently gave me a book to read. (Not very many people these days hand me a book to read; usually, they suggest books, but this person gave me the book). . . I am reading it, and finding it very interesting and enlightening, and very applicable in light of life as of late. Here is an excerpt, an example given in chapter 2:

"Imagine a young couple, Bob and Mary, who are involved in a local congregation. Mary gives birth to twins. Bob and Mary are now facing the prospect of trying to cope with babies who constantly need feeding and changing. In the first model, juggling the church ball alongside the new family responsibilities becomes impossible. Bob and Mary decide they will have to forget being involved in church activities on anything more than a minimal level for quite some time. So they make a unilateral decision to absent themselves from much of church life.

"In the alternative model, it is not only Bob and Mary's issue when the babies are born. It is an issue for the whole church. The congregation takes on some of the responsibility because their identity and life is that of persons-in-community. So perhaps a couple of people go around early each morning to bathe the babies so Bob and Mary can have some time together over breakfast. Or someone offers to take Bob to work for a few months so that on the way Bob can sleep or read his Bible, or they can pray together because Bob is not getting much chance to do these things at home. Bob and Mary may not be as involve in the church meetings, but they are more involved then ever inthe life of the community." (from the chapter entitled "Why Community?" in the book Total Church by Tim Chester and Steve Timmis)

I'd love to hear your thoughts on this li'l bit, or pass the book your direction when I'm finished =) Holla.

Lady of Reckless Abandonment

2009-11-08T06:40:00.003-07:00

Mel and I are going through "Lady in Waiting" (by Jackie Kendall and Debby Jones). It's possibly my fifth time reading the book, and high time I shared with someone else what I've been reading. Lady in Waiting (can I dispense with the quotation marks after using them once? please?) is a very challenging book for singles (even for guys!).

The very first chapter is entitled, "Lady of Reckless Abandonment." Two women are memorialized in this chapter - Ruth, and the sobbing, perfume-smearing woman of the New Testament.

Some thought-provoking quotes from this chapter are:
(quoted from another book, "Learning to Be A Woman") - "A woman is not born a woman. Nor does she become one when she marries a man, bears a child and does their dirty linen, not even when she joins a women's liberation movement. A woman becomes a woman when she becomes what God wants her to be."

..."happy indeed are those people, married or single, who have discovered that happiness is not found in marriage but in a right relationship with God."

Then, the authors mention the Woman with the Alabaster Box. "She... not only anointed Jesus for burial, but gave her all to a heavenly Bridegroom." (Mark 14:3-9, Luke 7:37, Matthew 26:13)

"How do you know if you have broken your alabaster box at the feet of Jesus? Such a decision will be reflected in reckless abandonment to the Lordship of Jesus Christ."

"Take your alabaster box, with your body, soul, and dreams, and entrust them to Jesus. when He is your Lord, you can joyfully walk in the path of life that He has for you."

The authors then mention Ruth as a prime example of a woman who recklessly abandoned herself to follow the Lord. Just recently widowed, she stuck it out with her mother-in-law to be an encouragement to her and followed the Lord she had recently "met." She left Moab **

**(called the "washbasin," / "washpot" (Ps. 60:8)(108:9)

and went to Bethlehem ("house of bread").

The authors commend Ruth's move as being beneficial to her spiritual growth; "even today there exist 'Moabites' who will undermine your growth if you spend too much time with them. Sometimes mediocre Christians resist the zeal and commitment of a dedicated single woman. Realizing that one's friends drive you either toward or away from God, you may need to find a 'new people' who will encourage your growth and not hinder it."

he who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm. pr. 13:20

"you mirror those who influence you. . . when a woman stops growing spiritually, the lack of progress can often be traced back to a friendship that undermined her commitment to Jesus."

do not be deceived. bad company corrupts good morals. (i cor. 15:33).

"your best friends should be cheering you on in your commitment to Jesus."

let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. (heb 10:24)

"like Ruth, look for something that will stimulate your growth in the Lord."

Sometimes this may mean moving to a different city, or state, or country. If you are in a desert currently, and growth is hard to "find," it may be time to move on to a new location, or find a different place to serve - one where you can be a spur and be spurred.

I have found that baby steps come in very handy here. It is crucial (at least, right now for myself!) that I surround myself with believers and focus on Scripture. I am memorizing Romans (and some other passages!) to keep my heart where it ought to be - focused on Christ, not this or that man! Carrying around notecards with verses written out is a great example of a baby step in keeping my heart focused on the Lord, and an excellent motivation to keep me excited on this "reckless" journey. :)

Also, more often i am seeing - in the various books I am reading - an undertone of this: Are you content to offer Jesus that which cost you nothing? ... "are you influencing those around you to consider a life-changing commitment to Jesus Christ"

I know I have been "influenced" by others - or rather, spurred, if you like the Hebrews terminology. I have been really enjoying being back in Michigan, simply because of the fellowship I find much closer now, less than an hour away! Being part of the earth-wide Body is also an encouragement, as many of my friends are migrating to distant shores, and the following quote I have taken as my "challenge" for the next few days (to start!)

Does your commitment to Jesus cause those around you to seriously consider whether Jesus is Lord of their lives?...

and the final chapter the authors give is this, and you can ask me how this is going:
Choose right now to put mediocrity behind you; courageously determine to pursue Jesus with your whole heart, soul, and mind. As a single woman, this is the perfect moment to establish a radical relationship with Jesus and remove any tokenism from your Christian walk.

:) All this I leave with you, readers, because I desire to challenge you with my "challenges" as well! May God grant you the wisdom to read between my lines and hear what He has to say on the matter!

200 stolen (from Mr. C) questions

2009-10-24T07:44:00.003-07:00

200. My Middle Name Is:
Elaine

199. I was born:
December 17, 1983 @ Blodgett Memorial Hospital in Grand Rapids, Michigan (at 11:09am)

198. I am:
an adopted child of the living God, a student, a teacher, a daughter, a sister, a friend, an auntie to all my friends' babies, and learning something new (or several things!) daily...

197. My cell phone is:
capable of sending random blank text messages to certain people (rather then messages with crucial information that i think i was sending...)

196. My eye color is:
greenish-hazel

195. My shoe size is:
women's: 10.5 or 11 men's: 9ish (because i have wide feet. LAME! )

194. My ringtone is:
Big House by Audio A. I recorded it from the computer... speakers ;)

193. My height is:
5 feet, 4 and three quarters inches. given I am barefoot and not slouching.

192. I am allergic to:
kitties (if they are unclean or hair-shedders - but i still likes them!), tree pollen (as I discovered in Arizona! boo.), ragweed, and men. I think I may also be allergic to romance novels that have nothing to do with Christ... *shudders*

190. I live in:
a house with my family (for now) in my old bedroom since I was about 15...

189. The last book I read:
finished? "Betrayal" by Jeanette Windle. VERY GOOD. :-) Currently reading? Several... ;)

188. My bed is:
blankety. lots of blankets. I sleep like a taterpiller...

187. Are you happy with your life?
yes :)

186. Last person to send you a text message:
amyconklin!

185. Ever smoked a cigarette:
only those pretend candy ones that get dust everywhere. haha.

184. AIM or MSN or Yahoo:
google chat, skype, and aim. depending if someone is on any of those and wants to trade voices or letters...

183. Do you email:
of course, but i PREFER hand-written snail....

182. How is the weather today:
moist. and there are leaves all over the ground everywhere. it is neato-keen.

181. Do you have your wisdom teeth:
in my mouth? no.... in a box? ....yes. haha.

180. Ever been to Disney Land:
no... and i could have gone, too! hmmm... someday maybe when i grow up i will go.

179. My favorite holiday is:
Resurrection Sunday!

178. The perfect date:
I've always been partial to anything in May. that's usually when things start acting all green (at least in mitchigin...) OH ... the other kind of date, I would say - is a leader who has done his research and planned something Spontaneous that is adaptable to change depending on weather and mood. bua haha. possibly involves throwing o shooting things, or playing with Play-Doh.

177. The last three cds I bought:
Shai Linne's Storiez and Atonement, and Philip LaRue, I think.

176. Last song that made you cry:
a lot of LaRue's songs make me cry. not really.

175. Who is your favorite cousin?
Lesley and Melissa are my close-in-age cousings. . . :) and we grew up relatively close. Melissa's really far away up in Ishpeming now. boo...

174. Who is your favorite road trip bud?
Lester!

173. Who are you IMing right now?
Ryan was clarifying his confusion about Skype. . . a few minutes ago.

172. Who's the last myspace page you looked at?
I have not a clue. I only get on THERE about once every three months.

171. If you could have a baby at the same time as someone else, who would it be?
if I coul PICK? Kelli or Christee, or someone that is near to my age in the same city that can tolerate me, but at this rate, it's going to be Quentin's wife... hahaha.

170. What did you do yesterday?
made Christee go mall-walkin' with me, crocheted some christmas presents, watched "The Visitor" and "17 again" and got frustrated with the prophet Isaiah.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
142. Love at first sight?
yes... I love to love on people. hehe.

141. Luck?
y charms? yes. they are tasty. Luck, though, is a "no."

140. Fate?
only in plays.

139. God?
yes, and someday everyone willll...

138. Aliens?
i AM one...

137. Heaven?
yes . . .

136. Hell?
yes. :(

135. Ghosts?
sure

134. Horoscopes?
re: believe = put trust in, A = no.

133. Soul mates?
my shoes and socks usually match. Hopefully if God has a man for me, he plans on sticking around. Therefore he has to be my left foot. . .

WHICH IS BETTER:

129. Hugs or Kisses?
depends on my mood. Hugs are good for comfortation, kisses are good to share love. I love getting kisses at church (even though I'm still getting used to it! hehe)

127. Phone or Online?
in.. person. seriously, why is this not an option. boo.

126. Red Heads or Black Hair?
I um... don't get it. I like everyone that has a head, whether it is hairy or not.

125. Blondes or Brunettes?
i like both. . .

124. Hot or Cold?
i am warm-blooded, i like cold drinks, and i like hot drinks too.

123. Summer or winter?
fall! sweatshirts = amazing!

122. Sun or Rain?
lots of sun with a body of water in the distance. And then a thunderstorm.

121. Chocolate or Vanilla?
Chocolate times infinity!!

120. Night or Morning?
morning when i feel productive, night when i am frisky.

119. Oranges or Apples?
apples with a book

118. Curly or straight hair?
mine is teh best - it can be both, depending on humidity and curling irons (as a straightener). i like people that aren't ashamed of their hair (or lack thereof)

LAST TIME I:

101. Saw someone I hadn't seen in a while?
all the time, ha.

100. Cried in front of someone:
a few weeks ago i think. i cry easier these days. meh!

99. Grew:
apparently some time in college. haha.

90. Who is the ditsiest person you know:
i don't know.

89. Who makes you laugh the most:
many people. God has blessed me with many silly friends. hehe.

87. The last movie you saw:
The Visitor *SEE IT.

82. The thing I don't understand:
calculus and women.

80. The most unsatisfactory answer I've ever received:
well i am a selfish human bean so to me, many answers are unsatisfactory, but by far the worst is "I can't..." from a student who obviously CAN. (boo)

79. The things I plan on doing this summer are:
taking classes, finding places to do practicum, hopefully driving to see some new babies slash old people (on road trips!), finding a job (because schools aren't open in the summer for subbing, usually...)

74. The thing I'm looking forward to most:
That Day.

73. The thing I'm not looking forward to doing:
grace and truth types of confrontation. The truth part is harder for me to "get out."

72. Today:
could be it!

71. This summer:
past? was GREAT. future? ihavenoidea!

70. This week:
is almost over! He is risen!

62. The person who knows the most about me:
Jesus. and then maybe my Christee and Kelli. or Tracie...

61. The person who can read me the best is:
Mel is a reader. boo!

60. The most difficult thing to do is:
let guys lead in friendships, especially when they are still learning (as am i). meh!

54. First time you had a crush:
like 5th grade. grrr.

52. Last time someone said what you were thinking:
Connie before Bible study when we were chillaxin. haha.

51. What is your dream job:
teeeechur n mummy

49. First job:
babysitting, delivering the Advance. Then Red Hot inn (meh!)

46. I hope:
on occasion, to be married some day with a dozen wee things

45. The best smell in the world is:
men's cologne when a man walks by (haha). Or turkey.

44. The person that makes me cry the most:
God

35. Florida or Hawaii:
Mexico?

33. My favorite piece of clothing:
jeans!! (boo teachers having to look "professional!" )

32. My favorite sport is:
to watch - basketball. to play - carpetball. haha.

30. My friends are:
also family. :)

29. My computer:
gets dusty.

28. The school I go to:
right now is "Grand canyon university" - back then, was MSU..

22. The all-time best movie is:
Pride and Prejudice (the BBC version that is 6 hours longish)

21. The all-time best thing in the world is:
the incarnation of Christ.

20. Last thing you ate:
maybe some moon toast.

19. The most annoying thing ever is:
the sound of chewing ...

18. The most annoying person you know is:
that one person. haha. i don't know.

17. I lose all respect for people who:
give up too soon.

16. The movies I have cried at are:
Life is Beautiful, Up, The Notebook, The Passion of the Christ, Flicka. haha. I don't usually cry at movies.

15. Last phone call:
me mum

14. TV shows you watch:
on tv? nothing. on my computer because we have no channels on our tv? Teh Office, Parks and Rec, Grey's Anatomy, 30 Rock. . .

13. Last friend you hung out with:
Christee Marlene Vosburg

12. I want to be:
a mom! haha. or... able to understand Isaiah.

11. The worst pain I ever felt:
maybe when my wisdom teeth were out, but that was actually kind of fun.

9. My room is:
kinda grungy looking. the paint color is.. very Joey.

8. My favorite celebrity is:
I like Brian Regan and Adrian Brody and Mr. Bean. haha.

7. My top person on MySpace:
i don't know. i don't go!

6. My favorite color is:
green lately, and Blue (and navy blue more lately).

5. My weakness is:
thinking

3. Who broke your heart:
me; also, a few people that want nothing to do with Jesus.

2. Things that make you feel great are:
me mum and little brothers! music! revelation! crochet! learning languages! socks! hoodies! the smell of fire! caffeine!

1. If I could do one thing to change the world, it would be...
Crochet on trees. and signposts. haha... or be more genuine about who He is.

Isaiah is annoying me at the present. . .

2009-10-23T20:50:00.004-07:00

I've spent so much time reading narratives and epistles lately that jumping back into the Prophetic Books (on my way through the Bible again) are being a difficult mental transition. Meh! So and therefore, I shall not "move on" until I get what's "goin' on..." Or something. But really, indepthly reading books like Romans/ Galatians and the chronicles and Paul's letters is good, but as far as staying on top of those books and continuing my progression through the old testament, ... it's going to be tricky to segregate and integrate my thoughts where necessary. *sigh*. . .

I'd love to discuss the objects of my reading with you all sometime... really! in person, on skype, on googlechat, on aim, with a cup of caffeination, with water, on a walk, in a box, with a fox, ... erm, yeah. But seriously. Being a teacher has taught me so much ... more on that later. My heart needs some logos.

eharmony

2009-10-19T14:24:00.003-07:00

Today I subbed for a class of fifth-graders. Overall, they were amazing kids, even if a large number of the school was out sick; However, there was one thing that... I have to share. Because it was one of those times that - as a teacher - laughing at the moment is unacceptable. Such as this.

The students are sitting at their desks, working on copying a Hallowe'en Poem onto a piece of paper. Sam finishes early, and starts pestering other students. I walk over to see if I can find something for you to do.

Sam: "Mrs. Johnson, are you married?" (It's either hit or miss with my name (no pun intended)... I only stress "MISS" (not Ms. or Mrs.) on occasion)...

me: nope.

Sam: "are you single?"

me: yup

Sam: "have you ever dated anyone?"

me: yup (if one can count a junior high romance...)

Sam: "You should go on eharmony."

me: hmmm... Are you ready to work on your newspaper project now? [while internally dying of laughter]

...a few minutes later, one of the girls confided in me "Miss Johnson, Sam wasn't being very nice earlier. He said you should go on eharmony..."

[commence internal laughing]

me: Well, it's ok... mumblemumble...

He DELIGHTED in me.

2009-10-14T18:41:00.004-07:00

This morning I woke up - an hour early - super refreshed from not-that-much sleep, and the remnants of my dream stayed with me for the majority of the day.

Jud Kratzer - a friend from college: one of the brave older souls who lived in the dorms with mostly freshman, full of wisdom and humor, and knowledge of fishtype things, who married an amazing woman and dashed off to the great northeast...

was in my dream. He gave me some sage advice, although I'm not even sure how he got in my dream...

And somehow we were talking about how people express themselves differently (perhaps this is because I find it extremely hard to put myself / my thoughts into spoken word at times, as most of my close-ies know. . .

And he said something along the lines of "you're more poetical than logical..."

which was weird, but it makes sense to me, in a way. It's so hard to just "out with it" in conversation sometimes, especially as is the American non-patient way of life and needs answers NOW. I like to think before i speak, and when people are impatient, I end up saying stupid things that never needed to be saying. I've been learning again the importance of shutting up - not all the time, like in high school - but when necessary.

And it's good. . .

But then I woke up with a verse dancing through my head:

He delivered me because He delighted in me. (psalm 18.19b)

And even though I've, well, delighted in this tidbit of a verse before, it was amazing to wake up to it. God is so so so amazing. And beyond my understanding. So I am not even going to attempt to expound - but I'd love your comments! (on blogger or on the FB)! :)

walking (on the path of) the gospel

2009-10-12T20:10:00.003-07:00

Getting into God’s Stride: from My Utmost (October 12th) for His Highest, Updated Edition

“Enoch walked with God …” (Genesis 5:24).

The true test of a person’s spiritual life and character is not what he does in the extraordinary moments of life, but what he does during the ordinary times when there is nothing tremendous or exciting happening. A person’s worth is revealed in his attitude toward the ordinary things of life when he is not under the spotlight (see John 1:35–37 and 3:30). It is painful work to get in step with God and to keep pace with Him—it means getting your second wind spiritually. In learning to walk with God, there is always the difficulty of getting into His stride, but once we have done so, the only characteristic that exhibits itself is the very life of God Himself. The individual person is merged into a personal oneness with God, and God’s stride and His power alone are exhibited.

It is difficult to get into stride with God, because as soon as we start walking with Him we find that His pace has surpassed us before we have even taken three steps. He has different ways of doing things, and we have to be trained and disciplined in His ways. It was said of Jesus—“He will not fail nor be discouraged …” (Isaiah 42:4) because He never worked from His own individual standpoint, but always worked from the standpoint of His Father. And we must learn to do the same. Spiritual truth is learned through the atmosphere that surrounds us, not through intellectual reasoning. It is God’s Spirit that changes the atmosphere of our way of looking at things, and then things begin to be possible which before were impossible. Getting into God’s stride means nothing less than oneness with Him. It takes a long time to get there, but keep at it. Don’t give up because the pain is intense right now—get on with it, and before long you will find that you have a new vision and a new purpose."

Of course, as a human, we tend to forget. . .

But God knew this, and gave us some neat verses to remind us: Among which is my favorite (though convicting) passagette in Hebrews:

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily hinders our progress. And let us run with endurance the race that God has set before us. ²We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, on whom our faith depends from start to finish. He was willing to die a shameful death on the cross because of the joy he knew would be his afterward. Now he is seated in the place of highest honor beside God’s throne in heaven. ³Think about all he endured when sinful people did such terrible things to him, so that you don’t become weary and give up. ⁴After all, you have not yet given your lives in your struggle against sin.

⁵And have you entirely forgotten the encouraging words God spoke to you, his children? He said,

“My child, don’t ignore it when the Lord disciplines you,

and don’t be discouraged when he corrects you.

⁶For the Lord disciplines those he loves,

and he punishes those he accepts as his children.”

⁷As you endure this divine discipline, remember that God is treating you as his own children. Whoever heard of a child who was never disciplined? ⁸If God doesn’t discipline you as he does all of his children, it means that you are illegitimate and are not really his children after all. ⁹Since we respect our earthly fathers who disciplined us, should we not all the more cheerfully submit to the discipline of our heavenly Father and live forever?

¹⁰For our earthly fathers disciplined us for a few years, doing the best they knew how. But God’s discipline is always right and good for us because it means we will share in his holiness. ¹¹No discipline is enjoyable while it is happening—it is painful! But afterward there will be a quiet harvest of right living for those who are trained in this way.

¹²So take a new grip with your tired hands and stand firm on your shaky legs. ¹³Mark out a straight path for your feet. Then those who follow you, though they are weak and lame, will not stumble and fall but will become strong. - Hebrews 12:1-12 New Living Translation (I know, new wording! But sometimes it's good to see/hear/read the Old Words in a new voice....
In other words, tonight was good. Very good. A smaller group of people gathered at Rob and Connie's for the Therefore Bible Study, and overall it was very encouraging. The topic? Circumcision and confusing people, to start. Wherever His chosen gather, though, there is just ... something. What a gift, this fellowship: true fellowship is only able to happen when two or more people let God "in" on their conversation (in the Olde English "conversation" = way of life; and in the modern-day useage of "conversation" = discussion, talkin, et cetera.)

And the last little bit - though not so Little - of Galatians 2 is a great reminder that it's not Us who has to worry, who has to be good all the time, who has to do the Living.

If one can say, "I through the law am dead to the law, that I might live unto God. . . I am crucified with Christ,
Nevertheless I live (apparently a kindergärtner can spell this word because it is a compound word made from (at least) three (3) words!) ... it is Christ who lives in me, then

yet not I, BUT Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh i live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, & gave Himself for me...

And we worry. ...

God forbid that we should so easily cast Him aside from our meditations and ponderings.
Make our hearts clean, Abba, so we can carry Your Word in our souls more effectively.

*Meditate on what Jesus says, everything that Jesus says...

2009-10-08T14:44:00.003-07:00

"Meditate on what Jesus says, everything that Jesus says...

Do you really know the words of the Lord?

The words that He spoke to and by His apostles?

Do you really know Jesus by His inspired word?

There is danger that you will begin to worship an imaginary Christ, not the Christ who says the things that are written, but a Christ of your own imagination, a harsh Christ who has not the meekness of Jesus, or a permissive Christ who is not the Holy One of God. It is so easy for us to invent another Christ and fail to be in subjection to the true Lord. But what joy it is to come to Jesus!

It is far from true that we have to choose between a dead book and a living Lord; the very reverse is true. Only in the living Book, alive by the power of the Holy Spirit who inspired it and who illumines it, only by the power of the living Book, read, preached, and shared, only by that living word of the Lord do we now come to the Lord of the Word, the living Lord Jesus Christ. God, who has spoken to the fathers through the prophets, has spoken at last by His son."

from Our Savior God: Studies on Man, Christ, and the Atonement Ed. by J. M. Boice
Selection from page 77, authored by Edmund P. Clowney, in the section entitled "The Unchanging Christ"

my answer

2009-10-07T13:51:00.002-07:00

"i will say this: the Gospel may be simple in that it is possible for one to give a slight definition in X number of words, and therefore easy to "remember" but outside of word count, it is (un)fathomably ridiculously mysteriously whoa."

The above won me the "I'm learning to use logic better award" from Mr. Derek Anderson (ha ha ha ha), who unwittingly provoked me to think for myself and was patient enough with me as I grappled with attempting to understand his logic regarding the Gospel.

I am still learning, and don't plan to stop any time soon, and ever so grateful for the brothers and sisters He has given me to spur me onward in the faith. Thank you, Jesus!

How do you memorize very long lists?

2009-10-03T19:43:00.006-07:00

Anyone who's ever read any of the letter's written by Paul knows that he uses lists quite often. (This may be partly hyperbolic, and you may have no idea to what I am referring, but Paul the apostle ... well, he employs the use of lists quite often).

So my question to you is,

what is your strategy for memorizing lists? Do you have one?

Here are a few I have tried slash am willing to try (as generously donated to me from Dennis, Joey, Derek, and Emily.

1. ACRONYM
This is basically something you will remember the rest of your life, whether you want to or not: "IP-MAT" (the five phases of mitosis: interphase, prophase, metaphase, anaphase, telephase).

Also: Every Good Boy Deserves Fudge ...

2. Song Transitions

"Sing it to a tune that gets stuck in your head"
Example? "This is the song that never ends..."

3. Write it out, over and over and over
Repetition is the key to learning, however, this wouldn't work while driving (for most people). . . ;)

4. Walk really fast and read it out loud.

Or march, and read in sync with your steps

5. Rap it out.
Just go gansta for a few minutes and come up with a slammin' rhythm. It helps to have a younger sibling interested in percussion... *him, her, he, or she...

6. Group according to various parts / factors. Then, memorize the groups.
You can group depending on punctuation, (commas, semi-colons) or possibly on opposites / related words.

Cutting a list into ma.na.gea.ble pieces is what our brains do naturally: look at phone numbers! 1-(234)-567-8910 they "break down" into bits of 3s and 4s.

So, my question is to you, how would you group / list the following List of Grossness, as it shall be referred to from here outward? Would you use one of the above methods, or do you have something that's "tried and true?" I'm ~~anxious~~ excited to hear your suggestions!

²⁸And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a reprobate mind, to do those things which are not convenient; ²⁹Being filled with all unrighteousness, fornication, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, debate, deceit, malignity; whisperers, ³⁰Backbiters, haters of God, despiteful, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents, ³¹Without understanding, covenantbreakers, without natural affection, implacable, unmerciful: ³²Who knowing the judgment of God, that they which commit such things are worthy of death, not only do the same, but have pleasure in them that do them.

*from Romans Chapter 1, KJV. . .

My Bucket List of Resolutions as a 20-something:

2009-09-30T10:34:00.001-07:00

My Bucket List of Resolutions as a 20-something:

short term: years 25 to 30, ‘Til He Returns / or Calls Me Home:

GOALS FOR MY 25^TH THROUGH 30^TH YEARS (in no particular order)

Delight in my Lord daily, not getting discouraged when I fail or things don’t “go my way.”

I’ve learned a lot this past year already about the importance of finding my delight solely in Him; surrounding myself with believers, and immersing myself in His word only adds to the beauty I see in His sacrificial, gracious love us-ward.

Learn OT Greek

On my way, actually! I found a book on sale, and I’ve got the alphabeta down ;) and can read words… Now, on to grammar, vocabulary, and everything else!

Keep praying for and writing to Ol’ Whoever He May Be, and wait patiently for the Lord to smack him upside the head and get his booty over here… I mean, Wait on the Lord for His choice. ;)

Since at least elementary school I’ve wanted to get married, like most females, but it wasn’t until high school that I realized I need to be praying for him, even if I have no idea he is, or if I am even one of those that “end up married.” Praying for him helps keep my heart in check, and my eyes on the one who made me as the true Lover of my face. Saving my kisses for him also keeps my mind away from dwellation on things of the flesh.

Start an actual group for people (not just women) to learn to crochet: as ministry, outreach, and fellowship: Check

See the Grand Canyon - again: Check.

I went on a day trip this spring (2009) after spending the night in Flagstaff at a coworker’s house, and it was amazing. Next time, though, I am taking someone with me. Big things like that are much better shared!

Lose 40 lbs.

I’ve somehow made ten disappear, but I would like the rest to just leave, as well.

Get a master's degree and my teacher’s certificate

Some people may not hold much to getting online degrees, but this is the path I’ve chosen (for now), and I’m on my way to getting it done! I’m single, 25, and the only thing tying me down is the need to get a teaching certificate so I can get an actual Teaching Job wherever He can best use me!

Run a marathon. Or something similar to a long distance

This will help me beat my body into submission, because I don’t want to be a pear on my 30^th birthday. Hehe.

Shoot something besides skeet

Write a book

Be a better listener and a better questioner

Spoil my nieces and nephews

Be more consistent with my written correspondence

Memorize the book of Romans.

I’m a little more than 1/32 done! I started awhile ago, but left off before I went to North Dakota

Study Navajo and Arabic, and keep up with my Spanish and Russian

I love languages, and how they work; I have a few books I would love to work on while I “have time,” I would like to learn at least the basics – phonics, grammatical structure,

Go to Turkmenistan, or at least South America

I might not make it to Central Asia (monetarily) in five years, but eventually I would love to go there. Call me nuts, but ever since I did my 10/40 window project on that country in my senior year of high school, that country has held a special place in my heart. That is also part of why I took Russian…
And if an opportunity arises, I’d love to go to a country in SA or CA, specifically somewhere in the Andes where there are indigenous peoples. We could crochet together.

Have my “own place” again…

Go to a few more National Parks – namely, Yellowstone, Glacier, Arches, and revisit Theodore Roosevelt (North and South Units!) And also perhaps visit Alaska.

I love that God put so much detail into the world He formed, and the few national parks I’ve been to have opened my eyes to how Big He is. I also just miss the sky.

Make my own version of Edwards’ Resolutions: hence, this list.

how interesting, indeed

2009-09-29T20:03:00.002-07:00

Today I feel like being lightly-fluffy, and tomorrow may be the opposite. So I am posting a survey I lifted from Laurie's facebook page :)

1. What was the last thing you put in your mouth?
Dark Chocolate Chex Mix. or water.

2. Where was your profile picture taken?
in my driveway.

3. Can you play Guitar Hero?
Slightly. All my flute playing has paid off ;)

4. Name someone who made you laugh today?
Quentin. He opened the door and went into hysterics when he saw what I was wearing. Apparently, a purple sweatshirt = hilarity in and of itself. And all this after I told mum that he would have this exact reaction.

5. How late did you stay up last night and why?
about midnight. I went to sleep after that. It ...may have been later or earlier.

6. If you could move somewhere else, would you?
the west, the north, somewhere where there is sky, and take my family with me so they could see the world.

7. Ever been kissed under fireworks?
ask me after I'm married. Maybe THEN i can say yes. HA . . .

8. Which of your friends lives closest to you?
my mom. or Christa/Crystie/Michelle/Shelly/Nicole. all those crazies.

9. Do you believe ex's can be friends? like X and X? they look like headless stick people.

10. How do you feel about Dr Pepper?
it's my caffeine terror. when i drink it i stay up later and forget why i am awake...

11. When was the last time you cried really hard?
driving back from WI

12. Who took your profile picture?

13. Who was the last person you took a picture of?

probably christine's wedding videos ;)

14. Was yesterday better than today?
about the same betterness

15. Can you live a day without TV?
only several . ..

16.Are you upset about anything?
not too much upsets me, but i have a big heart sometimes that gets me blumbly.

17. Do you think relationships are ever really worth it?

humans were created to be relational. so therefore and yes.

18. Are you a bad influence?
no, contrary to popular belief. I don't smoke, chew, or ... yeah.

19. Night out or night in?

i like both, depending on the weather, time of year, and people.

20. What items could you not go without during the day?
chapstick. water. the Bible. a pen. lotion.

21. Who was the last person you visited in the hospital?
apparently i am a bad friend...

22. What does the last text message in your inbox say?
Hey.

23. How do you feel about your life right now?
i want to be like a tree, planted by the water, trustin in the Father to help me grow!

24. Do you hate anyone?
no, but i am supposed to.... kjvesquely. ;)

25. If we were to look in your Facebook inbox, what would we find?
lots of group emails.

26. Say you were given a drug test right now, would you pass?
i do not do drugs.

27. Has anyone ever called you perfect before?
i dunna remember !

28. What song is stuck in your head?
nothing right now, except some softy piano from Fernando Ortega :) Oh, the deep, deep love of Jesus!

29. Someone knocks on your window at 2:00 a.m., who do you want it to be?
someone with coffee and an adventure planned.

30. Wanna have grandkids before you’re 50?
would be nice... we shall see. I'm waiting for kids, first. lol.

31. Name something you have to do tomorrow?
write a paper!

32. Do you think too much or too little?
i think almost all the time. not as much when i am unconscious, as far as i know...; 0 )

please give me a drink - I've been chasing you for so very long!

2009-09-26T20:32:00.006-07:00

"please give me a drink - I've been chasing you for so very long..."

How do we "get" faith?

...Well, if faith "comes by hearing," maybe ... partly by hearing. But what about those that cannot embrace the physical sense of hearing? what a blessing it is to have the Word in not only written form, but in Braille, in mp3-ness, and in multitudinous languages.

Praise God for the gift of His word us-ward that revealed who we were, and how much He still loved us {in spite of who we are/we/will be, as he can see all of that!}.

Praise God that there is more to the book of Romans than the first 2 chapters!

I was able to listen to the book of Romans today and could not help but catch a glimpse of the Hound in all His passion. He knew how vile we are, and yet still is persistent in chasing us down to the point of exhausted humility. This creator-God is One who knew what we were ("come, see a man, which told me all things that ever I did: is not this the Christ?")

and yet - in that knowledge of our capability of filthiness and whoring-after-anything-BUT-him, He showed; demonstrated; commended His love toward us: WHEN WE WERE YET WITHOUT STRENGTH... WHILE WE WERE YET SINNERS.

Such a Maker, so just is He, and yet so pursuant of us in all our filthiness because He desires our delight in Him. Were the whole ocean a giant pool of ink...

And yet, He asks her for water. The only kind she could offer would never be able to compare to the kind of water He carried around. . .

Resources and further pondering: Very ...

Smaryan: http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=john%204&version=NLT

monologue PDF: http://pluto.matrix49.com/15291/subpages/032209Sermon.pdf

from a ><> http://fringers.org/2008/12/22/yeshua-and-the-samaritan-woman-at-the-well.aspx

two modern takes on the story:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tipx1INTJ90&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q49BbfgJbto

If the links do not appear hyper, try "viewing original post."

and let me know your thoughts on all of this. I appreciate input, that i may be comforted together with you by the mutual faith both of you and me. :)rmns1:12:)

~amanda

poem I wrote back in 2003 or so.

2009-09-22T19:02:00.000-07:00

i am waiting, my sweet.
~Manda Johnson

I am waiting my sweet, waiting for you.
The years have been long, the good men so few,
yet I know that when you and I finally meet
I know I'll be glad I have waited, my sweet.

One look in your eyes might not let me know,
or a hug when things seem so low,
But at the right time I can surely depend,
My sweet will be given to me in the end.

Maybe we've already met, by chance in the hall,
maybe we're very close friends and 'tis all,
maybe I've never met or heard of you,
but know this my sweet, that I'm praying for you.

I'm waiting for you no matter the cost,
Saving my love for you so it won't be lost
Praying for the Father to bring you to me
And when that happens, my sweet, the heavens will sing.

I am waiting for you so patiently
I can't help but wonder if you're also waiting for me?

Get up offa that thang: ramblationalness on Doing (in response to today and the past few weeks)

2009-09-22T18:05:00.004-07:00

I got to be in a classroom (for pay!) again today. It was only for close-to-three hours, mind you, but i was IN.

Was I surprised that the substitute-teacher's-here-noise-level no longer bothered me?

Was I weirded out by being one of the few white people in the room?

Was the fact that most of the kids didn't seem care what I had to say, but most of them wanted to hear what I had to say unnerving??

Not in the least.

For it was there, that uncertified though I may be, I was who I am. With people not that much younger than myself, sharing what I've been given, without lesson plans or curriculum, or anything prepared.

(The Spanish class has no teacher yet, and is still a "vacancy" position. The sub who's been there since school started needed a sub, I guess. And her only note was "We're up to page 20" (which wasn't even really true). ... so i get to do what I did last year, albeit on my own time and much prayer;) And .... )

Being in those two classes reminded me so so so much of Sanders. The kids were rough and crunchy, had attitude, and some of the most inquistive spirits I've seen. Even though the noise was far above tolerable to most (as is usual for those days when a "sub" is present), I was able to bestow a little of what He's given me in the little 7oish minute timespan each class had with me. And like my Sanders kids, as soon as they had actual work (rather then vocab and pronunciation type of things) they quieted down to a loud whisperation, and most of them actually worked.

Students of all ages, ethnicities, and genders CRAVE structure, and being left with no lesson plans ensures chaos. So the ten minutes before class, when I realized there were no actual lesson plans, I could have freaked out and left, but I decided to wing it. Not the most desirable option for first impressions on a four-day assignment, but it was what i had to do. The first class was a little rough, because i had to probe to find out where they actually were in the textbook, but the second class i was able to get them working much sooner.

Tomorrow we are going to work on numbers 1-30, Review the picture story from today (about a kid who gets a letter from a female penpal hahaha), and do a lot of witing. hehehe...

But anyways. On to ... tnight.

I went to West Cannon right after Q was done with his piano lesson because I saw a few weeks ago that Kevin DeYoung (from URC @ MSU)

And his challenge was very encouraging and challenging to me - and I hope to a majillion others - especially in light of life lately. He's written a book entitled "Just Do Something......(insert very long sub-title;) )" and although I have yet to read it, he shared much of the premise. was was basically about the right and wrong ways to go about doing/seeking God's will. :)

So little things, like not having a job, desiring what He wants for me, waiting for Whom He may have for me, taking HUGE little steps (Spanish church!!), being diligent in where I am with classes and family life, getting off my butt and, well, doing something weird like going to a church downtown to help where it's direly needed when I could get lost in the crowd at West Cannon where my God-given talents don't really have the best of places to be used for His glory. (nothing against WC, but some of what He's given me doesn't make sense there anymore...... )

NB: (nota bona! / take note) - I'm also reading a miniscule book entitled "Why Join a Small Church" by John Benton... hehe. Good stuff, and thought-provoking. and Yes.

I'm not saying I'm perfect, but I want to - like "everyone else" be used by God. If this means I need to take that next step, I've already been encourage by a few great people to do so. This may not appear as sane or normal to most people, but then again, when have I ever been sane or normal to most people? ;)

So hearing tnight - from an ordained-type, and not just myself or some book with printed letters - that it's okay to Do Things was like a breath of fresh air. So much of society is all about safety, and wealth, and YourBestLifeNow, but very little do we hear the good of society. Almost every news program is all about the terrible things, even though America's all about being the "Promised Land." The people that "Do Things" are radical, and even though everyone wants to be Like them, they don't, really. Because if they did, they would be all about actually followation. Passivity sucks, like a vacuum, those who sit in "blessing."

What about that little church down the road, full of old people though it may be? What about the homeless guy at the gas station? What about that roomful of 30-or-so inner-city kids who come from broken homes?

They need Jesus, too. Even if they live in the ghetto, even if they have AIDS, even if no one remembers them. Whatever you do to the least of these...

How can they know if every last *cough* Christian is just soaking every Sunday, and never letting themselves get "squeezed?"

Get up offa that thang.

Still, my soul be still (wait!)

2009-09-20T20:15:00.005-07:00

this is the start of something new ;)

(and that's where HSM lyrics must stop)

But seriously, today was gooder than good. I'm still nervous about it all, but I think I'm supposed to be doing this right now. It's hard to be patient, so hard sometimes - especially when the only answers i hear are resounding "wait!" each time;
But.

He knows what He's doing, and He's still teaching me and molding me and my silly heart to desire las cositas que He desires. My heart's been stretched much since returning from the desert, and my eyes have seen many things that I couldn't have handled last year alone... But [for] God.

this song's been in my me-ness lately.

(and also, some lyrics from K&K:)

Still, my soul be still

Words and Music by Keith & Kristyn Getty & Stuart Townend

Still my soul be still

And do not fear

Though winds of change may rage tomorrow

God is at your side

No longer dread

The fires of unexpected sorrow

God You are my God

And I will trust in You and not be shaken

Lord of peace renew

A steadfast spirit within me

To rest in You alone

Still my soul be still

Do not be moved

By lesser lights and fleeting shadows

Hold onto His ways

With shield of faith

Against temptations flaming arrows

Still my soul be still

Do not forsake

The Truth you learned in the beginning

Wait upon the Lord

And hope will rise As stars appear when day is dimming

2009-09-16T16:15:00.003-07:00

I am going to write a book next week, but I need one thing from you:

a topic.

I give myself the deadline of Sunday, September 27th.

all topics accepted, only one (or two) may be chosen.

i shall NOT, however, address makey-outy topics. that's just... not me.

~Amanda

paper poem - from 2004

2009-09-11T16:46:00.001-07:00

Here I am,

baring my soul – yet again -
to a simple sheet of notebook paper:

Blue lines holding tightly to my words,

red lines on the sides, tightly framing my thoughts.

boy and barrels - written sometime in my undergrad years at MSU

2009-09-11T16:39:00.001-07:00

On my way home from a very frustrating class one cloudy afternoon in mid-October, I passed a just-emptied elementary school with one of the biggest playgrounds I’d ever seen. I turned my car around in the next driveway and pulled into the parking lot of the school. I grabbed my keys from the ignition and put them in my pocket after I turned off the car. Locking my doors out of sheer habit, I walked over to the large, painted concrete tubes lying in a half-circle on the edge of the playground.
After peering inside one to check for small children or animals, I crawled in and sat down, resting my head on the cool concrete. Someone had written “Jamie loves Joe” on the inside of the tube with a red marker, and next to that proclamation was another statement, “boys are dumb.” I smiled, remembering my own childhood opinions on the boys I once knew.
Some of the first friends I had made at school were boys. I remember how Paul, Derek, Jacob, Tom, and I had dug very elaborate tunnels in the sandbox during recess. We had contests to see who could stay on the merry-go-round the longest, or who could jump off the swing and land the furthest away from the swing set. I remember laughing as we raced down the sledding hill on our roll-up plastic sleds, landing in the middle of a pile of snow and other laughing children.

I can look with fondness on the earlier memories I have of boys, but as I got older I grew to be quite shy of the male populace in general. While my girlfriends all gradually became boy-crazy – or at least interested in boys – I became more and more intimidated by the very presence of boys, especially one in particular. I remember how it all started.
In the middle of second grade, around September, a boy named Steven Davis moved to the area and enrolled in the school I attended. From the very first day he arrived, he followed my best guy friends around and told them that he wouldn’t play with them if they kept playing with me.
A spider crawling near my foot on the inside of the tube caught my attention, bringing me back from my memories, drawing my attention to yet another bit of graffiti – “I wish they’d notice me.” I sighed, and let my thoughts drift back to those long-ago days when I had felt the very same way the author must have felt while writing those five short words.

© Amanda E. Johnson 2009

Journibles.... hehe.

2009-09-06T15:37:00.003-07:00

But

under

verb tenses

unto

upon

as it is written

reflective or hypothetical or seeminly silly questions

with

without

parentheses

even so

reckon

God forbid.

by nature

neither yield

yield

should...

know ye not?

All these and more - little words, though they may be, can change a life. This weekend Rob set us off on a new adventure - being guinea pigs ;) for Journibles...

We took the book of Romans and started by writing it out.... by hand... in journals, but only on the right hand of each page. The left is reserved for "notes."

I am pretty sure they shall be sold out, because I will buy them all. :) It was quite addicting, and even the times I've done similar things before didn't really compare - time flew by so quickly, and when I found myself wide awake before 6 this morning, I jumped back in and kept writing. I'm only on chapter 6 right now, but the next 10 chapters are going to fly past as well, Lord willing. I've noticed so much, as well. Not just the little words, but it's easier to see the whole picture - of the book of Romans AND the books in the Olde Testament that i've been reading.

hurrah!

The ONE

2009-09-04T06:53:00.002-07:00

Have you ever walked past someone and wondered "Is that the person I'm supposed to spend the rest of my life with?" Or perhaps, you think you have found that "person" but they don't even care about you, or your very existence?

That's what He has to deal with... every day.

Such pain, at His expense, because we choose...

shalom y paz

2009-09-02T21:06:00.002-07:00

Lord, I give up all my own plans and purposes, all my own desires and hopes, and accept Thy will for my life. I give myself, my life, my all utterly to Thee to be Thine forever. Fill me and seal me with Thy Holy Spirit. Use me as Thou wilt, send me where Thou wilt, work out Thy whole will in my life at any cost, now and forever. -Betty Scott Stam / Elisabeth Elliot / me

I found the above prayer in Elliot's "Let Me Be a Woman" and have been pondering it all day. And I realized, as i walked outside and noticed the moon shining brightly enough to cause the house-next-door to cast a shadow on the driveway, that today I had been blessed with a shalom that only He could have brought. It wasn't the most "perfect" day I've ever had, but He was there sovereignly keeping me from going down the wrong paths, and preparing the paths my feet wandered down. He led me to some tender, young shoots and fed me from His word, and my heart was at peace in His word, content to delight in my Master.

Because of the gospel, I can experience a shalom - a wholeness, if you will, or "completeness, soundness, and well-being of the total person (OT), also "the inner tranquility and poise of the Christian whose trust is in God through Christ" - and this shalom is something that one who is not living with the Meshiach as master and shepherd will not be able to comprehend. Praise Him, for I have been forgiven, and am being sanctified and looked at as His through the eyes of the Abba!

And Today, whatever state - of the Union - I am in, He is teaching me to be content. Waiting was ... easier .... today, and listening seemed easier as well. It may not always be so, but these "mountains" are here that we may look on them in the valleys and remember His words, and His grace toward his sheep, silly though we be at times.

Praise Him, for His word, that He has preserved through eonages of time, guarded for His chosen to hear and read. Praise His excellent majesty for reaching those that have not yet been able to hear His word in their mothertongue, and for all He is going to accomplish in their lives!

I can only pray for His will, and my heart's conformity to His will and desires. A friend recently advised me, "Delight in the Lord, and see what desires He gives you." This advice stuck, and I have been sitting at my Rabbi's feet (he is not only shepherd, meschiach, rabbi, but so much more than i can ever express!), falling more in love with the One who offers living water, the One quien puede satisfechar todas de mis necesidades - can satisfy all my needs - and the One who knows me better than anyone ever will, and still stays by my side, guiding me in paths of righteousness, because His name's fame depends on it.

And I love Him, because He told me what love was.

excerpt from Spurgeon's "All of Grace"

2009-08-28T17:12:00.001-07:00

God Justifieth the Ungodly

This message is for you. You will find the text in the Epistle to the Romans, in the fourth chapter and the fifth verse, “To him that worketh not, but believeth on him that justifieth the ungodly, his faith is counted for righteousness.”

I call your attention to those words, “Him that justifieth the ungodly.” They seem to me to be very wonderful words.

Are you not surprised that there should be such an expression as that in the Bible, “That justifieth the ungodly?” I have heard that men that hate the doctrines of the cross bring it as a charge against God, that He saves wicked men and receives to Himself the vilest of the vile. See how this Scripture accepts the charge, and plainly states it! By the mouth of His servant Paul, by the inspiration of the Holy Ghost, He takes to Himself the title of “Him that justifieth the ungodly.” He makes those just who are unjust, forgives those who deserve to be punished, and favors those who deserve no favor. You thought, did you not, that salvation was for the good? that God’s grace was for the pure and holy, who are free from sin? It has fallen into your mind that, if you were excellent, then God would reward you; and you have thought that because you are not worthy, therefore there could be no way of your enjoying His favor. You must be somewhat surprised to read a text like this: “Him that justifieth the ungodly.” I do not wonder that you are surprised; for with all my familiarity with the great grace of God, I never cease to wonder at it. It does sound surprising, does it not, that it should be possible for a holy God to justify an unholy man? We, according to the natural legality of our hearts, are always talking about our own goodness and our own worthiness, and we stubbornly hold to it that there must be somewhat in us in order to win the notice of God. Now, God, who sees through all deceptions, knows that there is no goodness whatever in us. He says that “there is none righteous, no not one.” He knows that “all our righteousnesses are as filthy rags,” and, therefore the Lord Jesus did not come into the world to look after goodness and righteousness with him, and to bestow them upon persons who have none of them. He comes, not because we are just, but to make us so: he justifieth the ungodly.

When a counsellor comes into court, if he is an honest man, he desires to plead the case of an innocent person and justify him before the court from the things which are falsely laid to his charge. It should be the lawyer’s object to justify the innocent person, and he should not attempt to screen the guilty party. It lies not in man’s right nor in man’s power truly to justify the guilty. This is a miracle reserved for the Lord alone. God, the infinitely just Sovereign, knows that there is not a just man upon earth that doeth good and sinneth not, and therefore, in the infinite sovereignty of His divine nature and in the splendor of His ineffable love, He undertakes the task, not so much of justifying the just as of justifying the ungodly. God has devised ways and means of making the ungodly man to stand justly accepted before Him: He has set up a system by which with perfect justice He can treat the guilty as if he had been all his life free from offense, yea, can treat him as if he were wholly free from sin. He justifieth the ungodly.

Jesus Christ came into the world to save sinners. It is a very surprising thing—a thing to be marveled at most of all by those who enjoy it. I know that it is to me even to this day the greatest wonder that I ever heard of, that God should ever justify me. I feel myself to be a lump of unworthiness, a mass of corruption, and a heap of sin, apart from His almighty love. I know by a full assurance that I am justified by faith which is in Christ Jesus, and treated as if I had been perfectly just, and made an heir of God and a joint heir with Christ; and yet by nature I must take my place among the most sinful. I, who am altogether undeserving, am treated as if I had been deserving. I am loved with as much love as if I had always been godly, whereas aforetime I was ungodly. Who can help being astonished at this? Gratitude for such favor stands dressed in robes of wonder.

Now, while this is very surprising, I want you to notice how available it makes the gospel to you and to me. If God justifieth the ungodly, then, dear friend, He can justify you. Is not that the very kind of person that you are? If you are unconverted at this moment, it is a very proper description of you; you have lived without God, you have been the reverse of godly; in one word, you have been and are ungodly. Perhaps you have not even attended a place of worship on Sunday, but have lived in disregard of God’s day, and house, and Word—this proves you to have been ungodly. Sadder still, it may be you have even tried to doubt God’s existence, and have gone the length of saying that you did so. You have lived on this fair earth, which is full of the tokens of God’s presence, and all the while you have shut your eyes to the clear evidences of His power and Godhead. You have lived as if there were no God. Indeed, you would have been very pleased if you could have demonstrated to yourself to a certainty that there was no God whatever. Possibly you have lived a great many years in this way, so that you are now pretty well settled in your ways, and yet God is not in any of them. If you were labeled ungodly it would as well describe you as if the sea were to be labeled salt water. Would it not?

Possibly you are a person of another sort; you have regularly attended to all the outward forms of religion, and yet you have had no heart in them at all, but have been really ungodly. Though meeting with the people of God, you have never met with God for yourself; you have been in the choir, and yet have not praised the Lord with your heart. You have lived without any love to God in your heart, or regard to his commands in your life. Well, you are just the kind of man to whom this gospel is sent—this gospel which says that God justifieth the ungodly. It is very wonderful, but it is happily available for you. It just suits you. Does it not? How I wish that you would accept it! If you are a sensible man, you will see the remarkable grace of God in providing for such as you are, and you will say to yourself, “Justify the ungodly! Why, then, should not I be justified, and justified at once?”

Now, observe further, that it must be so—that the salvation of God is for those who do not deserve it, and have no preparation for it. It is reasonable that the statement should be put in the Bible; for, dear friend, no others need justifying but those who have no justification of their own. If any of my readers are perfectly righteous, they want no justifying. You feel that you are doing your duty well, and almost putting heaven under an obligation to you. What do you want with a Saviour, or with mercy? What do you want with justification? You will be tired of my book by this time, for it will have no interest to you.

If any of you are giving yourselves such proud airs, listen to me for a little while. You will be lost, as sure as you are alive. You righteous men, whose righteousness is all of your own working, are either deceivers or deceived; for the Scripture cannot lie, and it saith plainly, “There is none righteous, no, not one.” In any case I have no gospel to preach to the self-righteous, no, not a word of it. Jesus Christ himself came not to call the righteous, and I am not going to do what He did not do. If I called you, you would not come, and, therefore, I will not call you, under that character. No, I bid you rather look at that righteousness of yours till you see what a delusion it is. It is not half so substantial as a cobweb. Have done with it! Flee from it! Oh believe that the only persons that can need justification are those who are not in themselves just! They need that something should be done for them to make them just before the judgment seat of God. Depend upon it, the Lord only does that which is needful. Infinite wisdom never attempts that which is unnecessary. Jesus never undertakes that which is superfluous. To make him just who is just is no work for God—that were a labor for a fool; but to make him just who is unjust—that is work for infinite love and mercy. To justify the ungodly—this is a miracle worthy of a God. And for certain it is so.

Now, look. If there be anywhere in the world a physician who has discovered sure and precious remedies, to whom is that physician sent? To those who are perfectly healthy? I think not. Put him down in a district where there are no sick persons, and he feels that he is not in his place. There is nothing for him to do. “The whole have no need of a physician, but they that are sick.” Is it not equally clear that the great remedies of grace and redemption are for the sick in soul? They cannot be for the whole, for they cannot be of use to such. If you, dear friend, feel that you are spiritually sick, the Physician has come into the world for you. If you are altogether undone by reason of your sin, you are the very person aimed at in the plan of salvation. I say that the Lord of love had just such as you are in His eye when He arranged the system of grace. Suppose a man of generous spirit were to resolve to forgive all those who were indebted to him; it is clear that this can only apply to those really in his debt. One person owes him a thousand pounds; another owes him fifty pounds; each one has but to have his bill receipted, and the liability is wiped out. But the most generous person cannot forgive the debts of those who do not owe him anything. It is out of the power of Omnipotence to forgive where there is no sin. Pardon, therefore, cannot be for you who have no sin. Pardon must be for the guilty. Forgiveness must be for the sinful. It were absurd to talk of forgiving those who do not need forgiveness—pardoning those who have never offended.

Do you think that you must be lost because you are a sinner? This is the reason why you can be saved. Because you own yourself to be a sinner I would encourage you to believe that grace is ordained for such as you are. One of our hymn-writers even dared to say:

A sinner is a sacred thing;

The Holy Ghost hath made him so.

It is truly so, that Jesus seeks and saves that which is lost. He died and made a real atonement for real sinners. When men are not playing with words, or calling themselves “miserable sinners,” out of mere compliment, I feel overjoyed to meet with them. I would be glad to talk all night to bona fide sinners. The inn of mercy never closes its doors upon such, neither weekdays nor Sunday. Our Lord Jesus did not die for imaginary sins, but His heart’s blood was spilt to wash out deep crimson stains, which nothing else can remove.

He that is a black sinner—he is the kind of man that Jesus Christ came to make white. A gospel preacher on one occasion preached a sermon from, “Now also the axe is laid to the root of the trees,” and he delivered such a sermon that one of his hearers said to him, “One would have thought that you had been preaching to criminals. Your sermon ought to have been delivered in the county jail.” “Oh, no,” said the good man, “if I were preaching in the county jail, I should not preach from that text, there I should preach ‘This is a faithful saying, and worthy of all acceptation, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners.’” Just so. The law is for the self-righteous, to humble their pride: the gospel is for the lost, to remove their despair.

If you are not lost, what do you want with a Saviour? Should the shepherd go after those who never went astray? Why should the woman sweep her house for the bits of money that were never out of her purse? No, the medicine is for the diseased; the quickening is for the dead; the pardon is for the guilty; liberation is for those who are bound: the opening of eyes is for those who are blind. How can the Saviour, and His death upon the cross, and the gospel of pardon, be accounted for, unless it be upon the supposition that men are guilty and worthy of condemnation? The sinner is the gospel’s reason for existence. You, my friend, to whom this word now comes, if you are undeserving, ill-deserving, hell-deserving, you are the sort of man for whom the gospel is ordained, and arranged, and proclaimed. God justifieth the ungodly.

I would like to make this very plain. I hope that I have done so already; but still, plain as it is, it is only the Lord that can make a man see it. It does at first seem most amazing to an awakened man that salvation should really be for him as a lost and guilty one. He thinks that it must be for him as a penitent man, forgetting that his penitence is a part of his salvation. “Oh,” says he, “but I must be this and that,”—all of which is true, for he shall be this and that as the result of salvation; but salvation comes to him before he has any of the results of salvation. It comes to him, in fact, while he deserves only this bare, beggarly, base, abominable description, “ungodly.” That is all he is when God’s gospel comes to justify him.

May I, therefore, urge upon any who have no good thing about them—who fear that they have not even a good feeling, or anything whatever that can recommend them to God—that they will firmly believe that our gracious God is able and willing to take them without anything to recommend them, and to forgive them spontaneously, not because they are good, but because He is good. Does He not make His sun to shine on the evil as well as on the good? Does He not give fruitful seasons, and send the rain and the sunshine in their time upon the most ungodly nations? Ay, even Sodom had its sun, and Gomorrah had its dew. Oh friend, the great grace of God surpasses my conception and your conception, and I would have you think worthily of it! As high as the heavens are above the earth; so high are God’s thoughts above our thoughts. He can abundantly pardon. Jesus Christ came into the world to save sinners: forgiveness is for the guilty.

Do not attempt to touch yourself up and make yourself something other than you really are; but come as you are to Him who justifies the ungodly. A great artist some short time ago had painted a part of the corporation of the city in which he lived, and he wanted, for historic purposes, to include in his picture certain characters well known in the town. A crossing-sweeper, unkempt, ragged, filthy, was known to everybody, and there was a suitable place for him in the picture. The artist said to this ragged and rugged individual, “I will pay you well if you will come down to my studio and let me take your likeness.” He came round in the morning, but he was soon sent about his business; for he had washed his face, and combed his hair, and donned a respectable suit of clothes. He was needed as a beggar, and was not invited in any other capacity. Even so, the gospel will receive you into its halls if you come as a sinner, not otherwise. Wait not for reformation, but come at once for salvation. God justifieth the ungodly, and that takes you up where you now are: it meets you in your worst estate.

Come in your disorder. I mean, come to your heavenly Father in all your sin and sinfulness. Come to Jesus just as you are, leprous, filthy, naked, neither fit to live nor fit to die. Come, you that are the very sweepings of creation; come, though you hardly dare to hope for anything but death. Come, though despair is brooding over you, pressing upon your bosom like a horrible nightmare. Come and ask the Lord to justify another ungodly one. Why should He not? Come for this great mercy of God is meant for such as you are. I put it in the language of the text, and I cannot put it more strongly: the Lord God Himself takes to Himself this gracious title, “Him that justifieth the ungodly.” He makes just, and causes to be treated as just, those who by nature are ungodly. Is not that a wonderful word for you? Reader, do not delay till you have well considered this matter.

closer than

2009-08-23T20:21:00.002-07:00

There is a friend that is closer than a brother...

I was reminded of that this weekend. God allowed me to visit my former roomate and her husband (with another former roomate) in Highland, Indiana. It was one of the most incredible snippets of time I have experienced of late as we reminisced about old tymes, made new memories, and spent countless seconds conversing and truly fellowshiping over free energy drinks and Pepsi.

No, seriously. God has blessed me with many friends, but a precious number of them are very balmacious to my soul.
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The people I can spill "everything" to without fear or apprehension of rejection...
Those who have seen the inner workings of the heart when I couldn't see it myself, ...

and those who love me in spite of who I still am growing into, in spite of my failures or ridiculousness.
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God has given me such people, and this weekend was one of the most refreshing I have had in quite a long time.
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The conversations we had were full of grace and truth, and especially of things we need to hear on a daily basis. (Is there a better word for basis?) It is SO GOOD to have friends that are not afraid to talk about you in front of you ;) and who seek edification at every turn.

I can only pray that I am such a friend to them as well.

Thanks, y'alls!

follow me - and a bunch of lame rhymes.

2009-08-19T19:27:00.003-07:00

so much can be found in the simplest of phrases: "follow me" a command, a beckon, an urging, a plea oh Saviour, Shepherd, Master be teach me to obey, to repent of all that is me, teach my heart to be commited to thee,

and submitted to thee,

oh Abba, grow me in all of these, so i may truly follow thee!

~motivated by "the call to discipleship" (Chapter one of "Christ's call to discipleship, by JM Boice)