connections

i am procrastinating, again.

tomorrow is test #2... on chapter one of the textbook, and on some random stuff we've covered in class. I have to make up the test myself, and i didn't sleep last night because i had lots of coffee at Earl's in Gallup, where they happen to have amazing chili (in the southern sense, meaning chili sauce, lol) to go with the amazing enchiladas, and a really neat atmosphere: there are tons of vendors that come up to your table with their jewelry, (one guy had some flutes) and it's all gorgeous and really decently priced (Christine and Gay bought some, but i didn't... maybe next time).
But it was good coffee, and I had a good time away from Sanders with some crazyfun ladies.
who decided - while browsing through a thrift store's party supplies - that they are throwing me a birthday party. ha. ha. and inviting a select few from school.


re: connections.
i am sensing more and more that there are a few connections happening between my students and i, and this is making it harder for me to think about "next year." and whatever that may bring.
For example, one of my kids calls me "Son." I'm not sure how respectful his motives are, but he calls me "son."
There are a few of them that call me "mom." Maybe because I started calling them "children," or maybe just because they had lunch (this is my 6th hour class) and are more "alert," haha. But anyways, while i was helping some children with homeworkses, I kept hearing "mom, mom..."
so when I looked up, yes, it was one of my children. "Mom, can i use the bathroom?" So I said yes, i don't want to have to clean up; he took the green plastic dinosaur (my new hall pass - the inflatable flamingo wouldn't stay inflated) and came back shortly.
Then this morning, one of the girls came in a little early and asked me what i thought of her hair. She had dyed it to a gorgeous wheaty color (from the original blue then pink) and it kinda shocked me that (1) it was a normalish color and (2) she asked me what i thought of it. (she usually ignores me, well, kinda).
And more and more the children are saying hello to me in the hallways.

So when it comes to next year, I'm not sure whether i am supposed to stay on here, where these kids really just need some love and attention, or if i am supposed to move on to another place.
Especially since I don't have a real teaching certificate.
I do know, however, that somewhere out there are kids who need love. Wherever that is is up to my Abba, though.
Marty Stamos... how one of my kids signed a poster in the hallway,... that cracks me up.